Splenda flavors for summer include:
Splenda in the grass,
Dingle and Rawberry,
Busted Cherry Whine,
Candygram for Mango,
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Whatever The Fuck It Is And Cheap Vodka(Nod to ya 'Puma)
Liquid Nitrogen un flavored Slurpee, for those that are only in it for the brain freeze
This Gas Station Hates You Orangeberry.
This Beverage Is Here For the Purpose Of Profiling Illegal Immigrants Razzataz.
(aka Red State Sherbert)
Fratboy Hazing Ritual Blueberry.
I had two variations of slurpiees on saturday. Don't ask me why. I just did. Road trip day. geez, get off my back already. Ok, I know they're bad for me. geez.
dear god. They were both awful. I just wanted cherry flavor. but noooo.
the first one was called "tiger's blood". it was like 1000 parts cotton candy flavoring and one part water. good lord! It was the liquid equivalent of the gas station rotating zombie hotdog.
the next one was raszberry (with a z) lemonade. it was like 500 parts bubble gum flavoring and 100 parts battery acid and no parts water. Giant cup of liquid headache anyone?
The only rational for these flavors is that they must be used for a poor man's margarita mix with crap vodka, to cover the crap vodka taste with even more horrible flavors.
No part of this story is untrue. those were the real names, and this has been my testimony.
For a visceral flavor that 'tingles-all-over' choose Slurpees Zoster™, but to 'tingle-all-under' go with Slurpees Simplex™!
This world is a comedy to those that think, a tragedy to those that feel.
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