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Comment by JJJ23 on Monday

"Knock knock."

"Who's there?"

"Yo Momma."

"Yo Momma who?"

"I'm your birth mother, we have a lot to talk about. I'm sorry I was so cavalier before, I really don't know why I said it that way."

Comment by JJJ23 on Monday

"Knock, knock."

"Who's there?"

"Abbott & Costello's Surveying Service."

"Why haven't you given me a property assessment yet, and also for the bit, Abbott & Costello's Surveying Service who?"

"Zone first."

Comment by JJJ23 on December 7, 2018 at 2:34pm

"Knock, knock."

"Who's there?"

"A doctor."

"A doctor who?"

"I'm like a British alien or some shit."

Comment by JJJ23 on November 26, 2018 at 6:52pm

Knock, knock.

"Who's there?"

"The Police."

"The police who?"

"you don't have to put on a red light, put on a red light..."

Comment by MacSpruce on November 11, 2018 at 9:19pm

A year ago scores of people were killed or wounded by a gunman at the country music festival in Las Vegas. This month a dozen people were gunned down in a country-western bar in Thousand Oaks, Ca. Maybe it's time to talk about clamping down on country music. 

Comment by LL Bein on October 30, 2018 at 10:26pm

I forget how the saying goes but, keep your enemies close, and your torches and farm utensils closer.

Comment by 38chrysler on October 29, 2018 at 12:03pm

Evil Chickens lay Deviled Eggs.

Comment by JJJ23 on October 26, 2018 at 9:02pm

"Based on merely my opinions", yes, I don't need other's opinions. I make my own decisions and am responsible for them.

Plainly stated Donald Trump, the current president, is the head of the republican party. The republican party have been selling themselves to the public as the party of protestant christianity for nearly four decades to get votes. Donald Trump and all republicans who support him have made a mockery of the morality of the teachings of Jesus Christ.

To remain in support of Donald Trump is to side with him over Jesus Christ. This is right there. This is not something that you don't know. It's something you absolutely do know and have decided you're fine with. 

I don't know whether god exists or not, I don't think anyone does. I don't care anything about god, I don't believe in god, I don't think a lot about god. I've stopped doing that.

If you do, care about god, then think about how Donald Trump has represented the "party of protestant christianity" and the United States.

I won't be taking down any of this shit because I stand by all of it.

Comment by 38chrysler on October 26, 2018 at 8:36pm

...it was worse than attending Hokey-Pokey dance lessons taught by quadriplegics. 

Comment by 38chrysler on October 26, 2018 at 8:31pm

...it was worse than being the only Turkey in the coupe on Thanksgiving day.

Comment by 38chrysler on October 26, 2018 at 8:29pm

...it was worse than being the only A-Cup at a Titty-Bar.

Comment by 38chrysler on October 26, 2018 at 8:25pm

...it was worse than showing up at an Antifa Rally wearing a MAGA Hat.

Comment by 38chrysler on October 26, 2018 at 8:22pm

...it was worse than being a Diabetic at a Pie Eating Contest

Comment by 38chrysler on October 26, 2018 at 8:20pm

...it was worse than a house full of sisters that all had to use the same bathroom at one time.

Comment by 38chrysler on October 26, 2018 at 8:14pm

My Apologies to Comedy Whirled if we overstepped the boundaries of this great site!  ;-)

Comment by Comedy Whirled on October 26, 2018 at 6:36pm

C O I N C I D E N Z A !   Turner Classic Movies played the Mike Nichols-directed GILDA LIVE (1980) late last night and in it Father Guido Sarducci addressed several issues that are pertinent to the current OPEN MIC discussion:

Comment by JJJ23 on October 26, 2018 at 3:07pm

I don't give a good goddamn about some scientists, nor did I mention any. The notion of a hell was created to scare people enough to manipulate them into doing what you want them to(fear mongering), with heaven being a reward for after they do what you told them to. But the nothingness that is death is actually much scarier than any hell that could be thought up which is why people desperately cling to any idea of any sort of afterlife good or bad, it's something instead of nothing. As for me and you knowing one day a definitive answer, no we won't . We'll be breathing and maybe feel some pain and then think "oh I'll live through this, just like I've lived through everything" and then no.

There'll be know knowing anything new, no surprises, or light, they'll be no more you. Not, oh that and then now it's, no, no more. I don't know there's no god, no one does, but there's no god.

Being a follower of the teachings of Jesus Christ who truly believes Jesus is god and being a Trump supporter are two things one person can't do. Jesus talked about loving your fellow man even at their worst, Donald Trump incites violence among civilians and talks about conquering other countries, which would mean murdering who knows how many innocent people. If you believe yourself to be a christian and you are supporting Donald Trump then you have already abandoned your god in favor of a fat orange cunt and his gang of lying stooges, and you didn't even know it. Scientifically speaking, of course. (p.s. the Super Natural? fuck off)

Comment by JJJ23 on October 26, 2018 at 8:17am

"and low, though you may lay down with pornstars, with your wife at home recovering from childbirth, let you be raised up on high to great bigly political status, and it will be good, and the dumb will suck your ass."

Comment by JJJ23 on October 26, 2018 at 6:28am

But the stuff about rich people having a hard time getting into heaven, the bible says that, while the republicans are currently trying to convince everyone that being rich is what validates a person. And Trump is a fear monger, that's true. "Jesus was a republican", did he ever say something like "you're brown I'm not giving you a job, and get the fuck away from my country!", he was pretty brown by the way, a middle easterner. He did say "love thy neighbor as thyself". By the way, god is a fictional character. A 600 year old man didn't build a big boat and put two of every animal on it. That not only didn't happen it couldn't happen, and you know that. If you'll pretend to believe that, you'd be willing to pretend to believe just about anything. That's the point. "I looked out at the crowd and there was a million, a million and a half people", what? That's nonsense. You've been had by a con-man, it sounds like probably many of them.

Comment by JJJ23 on October 25, 2018 at 7:00pm

I wasn't worried at all about the immigrant caravan, but then Trump said there's some muslims trying to sneak in with them, and not even the cool rich kind of muslims he sells weapons to, but the dangerous explodey kind. Rich does equal good, which is why the christian bible talks about how easy it is for rich people to get into heaven. Now I'm voting republican across the board on November 6th. Fear successfully mongered!

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