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Comment by Treeshadow on Friday

99% of people who lose their train of thought

Comment by Treeshadow on July 29, 2020 at 5:06pm

One word movie critiques:

The Farmer “Outstanding!”

The Hypnotist “Mesmerizing!”

The Welder “Riveting!”

The Pencil “Sharp!”

Quintuple Solar Systems “Five Stars!”

Comment by Treeshadow on July 28, 2020 at 9:32am

Does one go ON an elevator or IN an elevator? Or ONTO, or INTO? Sometimes English ain't ez.

Comment by Treeshadow on July 26, 2020 at 9:39am

On dropping food: There is no ten-second rule at the veterinarian.

Comment by Treeshadow on July 5, 2020 at 12:08pm

Thank you.

Comment by Treeshadow on July 5, 2020 at 12:08pm

OKAY I'LL BUY THE @#$% EARWAX REMOVAL THING NOW STOP THE ADS!

Comment by Treeshadow on July 5, 2020 at 12:08pm

Dear Zuckerberg, Gates, Apple, Google, Amazon, Mother Theresa, whoever: PLEASE, no more earwax removal ads!

Comment by Treeshadow on July 5, 2020 at 11:40am

Please, no more earwax removal ads in my feed. For the love of sweet Mother Mary Queen of Scotland STOP!

Comment by Rosedude on June 11, 2020 at 5:30pm

Hey Mac.  Those 110,000 were very weak.  I like people who don't get sick.

Comment by MacSpruce on June 11, 2020 at 10:06am

If cleanliness is next to godliness, is filthiness next to dogliness?

Comment by MacSpruce on June 11, 2020 at 10:05am

110,000 American corpses, or as Trump would call them, a bunch of STONE COLD LOSERS.

Comment by Treeshadow on June 9, 2020 at 10:59am

Wildflowers grow like hotcakes.

Comment by JJJ23 on May 20, 2020 at 2:12pm

Can we all start referring to Gisele as Gisele "El Chupacabra" Bundchen?

Comment by Treeshadow on May 20, 2020 at 10:14am

I bet when sea turtles have kinky sex the safe phrase is, "plastic bag."

Comment by Mike McHuman on May 5, 2020 at 11:27am

In San Diego, you can't use golf carts on the golf course. So, I am wondering: how will I get my exercise now?

Comment by JJJ23 on May 1, 2020 at 3:07pm

It's been a while since I got laid, I was in a narrow store aisle and I did that thing with this young woman where I was trying to step out her way, she tries to step out of my way, I end up walking right into her and I almost had a #metoo movement.

Comment by MacSpruce on April 28, 2020 at 7:51pm

The cult of Trump: First you drink the Kool-aid, then you drink the Lysol.

Comment by Treeshadow on April 28, 2020 at 1:56pm

Has Yoda ever said, "Yadda-yadda-yadda?" Has anyone ever said, in Pig Latin, "ixNay ixoNay."

Comment by JJJ23 on April 26, 2020 at 11:04pm

If you go to shake someone's hand and they go for a fist bump, then you change to fist bump as they're changing to handshake, I think the proper response is to then do the scissors hand motion.

Comment by JJJ23 on April 25, 2020 at 7:47pm

Mr. Oblivious: "Tiger Woods, more like tiger jungle, right? Tiger's are from the jungle, y'all see that Tiger King? Tiger's are in India too they say. India, it's more like NativeAmericaia, you know. Indiana is also a place."

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