Comedy Whirled

What Sucks about Trick or Treating in the Big Apple

Wet popcorn balls.

Floating Baby Ruths are not Baby Ruths.

Getting to the next house.

Dodging debris.

Mom won't let you use the flashlight. Mom's special flashlight. The one that hums.

The man in 6B always flashes you for "the treat."

You can't swim.

Roaches can swim.

After eating your treats, mom makes you wait thirty minutes before going out to play.

Mandatory evacuation.

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Comment by MadAdam on October 30, 2012 at 7:39pm

The treats contain no trans fats.

The guy giving out his homemade "Fudgettaboutit".

Comment by Shag on October 29, 2012 at 4:03pm

I keep getting mugged for my Hershey's Kisses.

Comment by Shag on October 29, 2012 at 4:01pm

Everyone keeps telling me that I have a nice Shithead costume.

Comment by Shag on October 29, 2012 at 3:58pm

The needles keep making holes in my trick or treat bag.

Comment by Shag on October 29, 2012 at 3:56pm

It is soooo hard to get your costume on over top of your bullet proof vest!

Comment by Iverneil on October 29, 2012 at 2:17pm

All those razor blade cuts on the roof of your mouth.

Comment by Buttermilk on October 29, 2012 at 1:21pm

Not being allowed to trick or treat in the projects even though they are giving out cocaine & guns.

Living in a gated community with cheap snobs.

Having your loot X-rayed by your mom & her sniffer dogs

Comment by Gerhardguffaw on October 29, 2012 at 1:17pm

Used condoms filled with gummy bears are the treat of choice.

Comment by Gerhardguffaw on October 29, 2012 at 1:14pm

Cheap ass rich people won't let you past the doorman.

Comment by Buttermilk on October 29, 2012 at 1:12pm

Getting apples & a toothbrush from the dentist next door..

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