Comedy Whirled

Those Were Different Times #355

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Results:

5. "You morons. It says clearly on the bottle for ages 7 to Up."
-VomitFlop

4. He smiled right up to the explosion
-Iverneil

3. Oh what a cute little sprite he isn't.
-Rotwang

2. When asked by a group of parents what the "it" that it "does" was 7up responded that they couldn't disclose that information, but that if your child has begun drinking 7up he or she should continue to do so or the "it" will stop and the "doing" will stop and then you'll have your answer.
-JJJ23

1.2. When he was older, for reasons he never understood, he vacationed in sugar cane fields.
1. After numerous failed relationships, happily married a woman whose breast enhancement surgery was performed by Corning Glass.
-RoadKillHairPiece

Views: 169

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Comment by RunSilent RunDeep on March 12, 2017 at 1:40pm

... Until the Frito Bandito steals it.

Comment by MacSpruce on March 12, 2017 at 9:45am

And by 'Se7en' we don't mean gluttony. Honest!

Comment by MacSpruce on March 12, 2017 at 9:44am

And by 'does it' we mean induces tooth decay and diabetes.

Comment by MacSpruce on March 12, 2017 at 7:44am

And by 'customers' we mean marks.

Comment by RoadKillHairPiece on March 11, 2017 at 7:46pm
Mom, I'd prefer breast feeding if you can carbonate your milk.
Comment by Iverneil on March 10, 2017 at 6:23pm

Helps him wash down the triple alarm buffalo wings

Comment by RoadKillHairPiece on March 10, 2017 at 3:04pm

Most of his relationships with women ended when he asked them if they happened to have glass nipples.

Comment by RoadKillHairPiece on March 10, 2017 at 3:01pm

When he was older, for reasons he never understood, he vacationed in sugar cane fields.

Comment by RoadKillHairPiece on March 10, 2017 at 2:58pm

After three years of 7Up and Lucky Charms for breakfast, his hair turned into candy floss.

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