Those Were Different Times #175: The Hypnobration!
Introducing: "INTRODUCING AN EXHILARATING TECHNIQUE STOP smoking by COLE"
and the Un-Freaking Believeable You Magnificent Bastard" award goes to:
3. Through hypnosis he's cured a lot of people of their smoking habits, but now they all think they're chickens.
2. On the back it reads: "Quit while you're a head!"
1. He just slices their lips off