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presenting PICKING UP GIRLS MADE EASY! 

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Comment by MacSpruce on April 5, 2011 at 10:59am
If you can convince them to swallow a couple of pounds of nickels, a powerful electromagnet does the trick quite nicely.
Comment by Donairs on April 5, 2011 at 8:41am

Featuring such fool proof pick-up lines as: 

I like your face, can I touch it?

So, where exactly do you live?

The word of the day is 'legs,' whatta say we go to my place and spread the word . . . and your legs. Because I want to have sex with you is what I'm saying.

What time do you have to get back to heaven? Because at some point in the near future I would like to insert my penis into your vagina.

Comment by chuckkling on April 5, 2011 at 12:53am

I thought this was all I needed...

Comment by mellowpuma on April 4, 2011 at 10:03pm

Step fourty one: Making theDIRTYmidget judge the merit of over forty blog responses while restraining your "evil villan laugh", and how it has no bearing whatsoever on the subject of to picking up women, but makes you feel happy in a sick way.

(I only joke because tDm is cool enough to do so to)  (^5)

Comment by mellowpuma on April 4, 2011 at 9:54pm
Step forty: Avoiding Remorse, the ultimate guide: "embracing practical satanism", or "I wouldn't be able to do this if there were a god".
Comment by mellowpuma on April 4, 2011 at 9:52pm
Step thirty nine: The "I am a powerful third world dictator who will use a dirty nuke/chemical weapons on my own people unless you sleep with me" routine
Comment by mellowpuma on April 4, 2011 at 9:49pm

Step thiry eight: A guide to casually wearing operating room scrubs around town in a casual manner, and implying almost ashamedly, that you work at a free clinic which serves children with cancer, or "the keys to the gold mine".

Comment by JJJ23 on April 4, 2011 at 9:46pm
"Listen endlessly to her thinly veiled stories about the other women in her life who she's jealous of or threated by in some way, and hours later when you think she might be done, tell her she's a better woman than any of those whores" 
Comment by mellowpuma on April 4, 2011 at 9:39pm
Step thirty seven: Transitioning between claiming to like whatever kind of music/romantic comedy she likes to initiating rough anal sex: the delicate dance.
Comment by mellowpuma on April 4, 2011 at 9:37pm
Step thirty six: Refuting the often heard claim that the world would be a better place if you just jumped off a cliff / under a bus: the facts and the fiction.

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