J.P.’s G.E.D. Results. [Grimacing Expressions (of) Dorkiness.]
The “Water Burn Baby®.” Award.:
He's a very good rocker (except when Wapner is on). drwho
(I was really surprised no one did any Ben Stiller or Tom Cruise gags, but was even more surprised when this Fokker showed up.
Good one, Doc!)
Here are the sounds I think this guy is making for each of his poses . . .
Eeeeeeeeeee! (*shart*) Donairs
Top-Ten On The Rocking-Curve®.:
10.5. I won't say "Rock around the Cock". I just won't!
10.25. Why I like to tango.
10. He trained with a Shake Weight. Buttermilk
9.75. The evolution of the Five Dollar Footlong song.
9.5. He may be rockin' but his pants beg to differ.
9.25. His inability to throw devil horns was a contributing factor to low album sales.
9.125. The fact this album has wear marks leads me to believe that someone has used it and is rocking under false pretenses. I give you Nickelback.
9. It looks like he's teaching me how to carry a rock. chuckkling
8.5. it's Robin Williams when he was just sperm
8. there's nothing like a pair of Comedy Pants like J.P. is wearing to let you know that the Whacky-Factor is through the roof on this album. Comedy Pants are expensive...the cost is nothing less than the comedian's soul. antistar
7.5. I'll bring the paper and scissors.
7. It was a fun class except for the segment on Assless Chaps. Gerhardguffaw
6.5. Track one: "Sticks"
Track two: "Knee Slap"
Track Three: "Spoons"
Track Four: "Washboard"
Track Five: "Look Mean"
Track Six: "Grunt"
Track Seven: "Fake Hand Signals"
Track Eight: "Meet more Retards"
Track Nine: "Get Retards to think you're cool"
Track Ten: "Make an Album"
6. Includes the new hit single: "Squirting out of every Orafice" Shag
5. J.P.'s pioneering moves: the excited to see you, the happily holding a shotgun whilst crouched, the handing someone a jar of jam while crying, the air hump, the being robbed but worrying because you don't have any cash on you, and the Mario Cantone were all sold to Mick Jagger in 1960 for half a ham sandwich and an iced tea. (I realize Mario Cantone probably wasn't alive in 1960) JJJ23
(According to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mario_Cantone, Mario Cantone was born December 9, 1959, so I hereby deem this caption ‘perfect’. Your prizes are a jar of jam, half a ham sandwich, an iced tea and a homemade VHS® tape of Season One of “Steampipe Alley™”. I’ll understand if you weep openly.)
4. With all your favorites such as...
* I'm a huge Douche
* I get no pussy whatsoever
* I masturbated with your scissor handles
* My best friend is Algebra
* I love my snuggie
* I don't get high, but my pants sure do.. Michaelred73
(My favorite is in the larger letters.)
3.75. This is a groundbreaking album -- it came years before it was cool to be a spaz.
3.5. This record was found among extraction pliers and car batteries at Abu Ghraib prison.
3.25. And, in succession, from left to right:
- "Heyyy, suck it, you mook!"
- "Look at this fuggin' guy over here, eh!?"
- "Aaaah! You whore! I said no biting!"
- (see below)
- "What!? You didn't think I could hit some fuckin' bitch in the mout'!? Get outta my sight!"
- (foreground) ". . . And he was cryin' blubbering like a bitch, sayin', no, please don't kill me, man! Please, I'll do anything, I'll suck your dick! It was a fuggin' disgrace."
3.125. And we see that, 4th from the left is, without a doubt, the infamous 'I can't believe she's letting me do it this way' pose.
3. This album title was the second choice after the label rejected "J. P. Watches You While You Sleep."
2.66...7. Includes the hits,I'm a fool,Don't step on my blue chino's,and Jump off the 59th street bridge.
2.33...3. Epilepsy is not funny its hilarious.
2. J.P. teaches you how to shit when your constipated. Mervin97
1.75. ...with your cock out.
1.5. He's got the jizz hands down pat.
1.25. He was formerly the pivotman for the Circle Jerks.
1. and by "Rock" he means how to be a bukkake target. drwho
C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S !!!!!!!!!!
To All You Rockers and Rockettes !!!!!
You May All Now Advance To The Spotlight Dance®.