Thank You For Praying
they won't start eating until Frank Whaley is seated
2011 Easter Edition Of The “Get It?®” Award or
“How To Write An Entire Stand-Up Hunk Mocking A Gospel Group
With The Knowing Eye Of A Master-Theologian” By MacSpruce
(Each and every entry within this list could be followed by a Sacred Rim-Shot.)
When the supper bell rings, it's a regular Calvary Stampede.
You don't want to cross them. (Get it?)
The album that asks the musical, ecclesial, gastronomical, hypothetical question: What would Jesus stew?
Aww Jeez, all-you-can-eat loaves and fishes again?
Looking at the Calvary Chords, I can't help but wonder: who's nailing who?
You can tell the 'Mary Magdalene' of the group by her slutty red shoes.
The Calvary Chords' music is, of course, excruciating ...
Charlie Don’t Sup.®:
What a supprise, I see a creepy white van outside. mellowpuma
"C'mon lets hurry up and eat! I have a date with that dreamy Manson boy who just moved in down the street! Oh and Dad,he want's to know if he can use your van?" DonnieBrasco u cock-o
custards last stand bigjas
Uh, in this case I will take the soup. drwho
Somehow, hipsters get away with dressing like this TODAY.. matthew charles mccosh lutes
I didn't know that Amish folks had telephones!
"The Chords" should be "The Cords", with all that Corduroy that they wear!
What, no Turtle Neck Sweaters?
This was around the time that drug usage spiked! Shag
featuring the timeless hits...
"squeal like a pig"
"this corn is somethin' special"
"you got a purty mouth" Jams3kds
The Sanctified 12 Epistles.®:
12. Includes their last hit "Leader Says We All Get Kool-Aid Tonight At Suppertime"
11. Come, we'd love to have you for our supper . . .um, I mean for supper . . . we'd love to have you join us for supper.
10.5. Ironically enough the woman on the far left used her uncanny fashion sense to go on and design countless shower curtain patterns...
10. The much anticipated follow up album, "Breakfast Time" never happened when all the guys got up in the middle of the night and hauled ass...
9. Sister Wives as seen with camera and sound man circa 1968.
8. Aw man! Lamb chops & cheese for dinner again?
7. ...And by chords they mean the things that go around their necks
6.75. Guess which one dosed about 45 minutes ago?
6.5. they forgot the food because they're all trippin' balls
6.25. Something tells me it smells like shit in there.
6. they sit & smile all creepy like that for the full 30 minutes it takes for the pizza guy to get there
5.5. Mmm, this nothing is delicious.
5.4. Because it's gauche to get raptured on a full stomach.
5.3. Those three sitting on the bench: they were "rescues".
5.2. The family that says grace while covering their genitals with both hands and smiling together, stays together.
5.1. The Cavalry Chords was their second choice for a band name. Apparently somebody had already taken "The Penis Sisters"
5. They are eating your fear.
4.5. Track 1; Brainwash Blues.
Track 2; Serial killer Dreams.
Track 3; Luppertime.
4.25. Includes the smash hit; Key swap.
4. Jim and his six wives.
3.5. The self-assured smile of the chick at the front comes from her awareness that she can escape the clutches of the cult any time she pleases simply by clicking her heels together three times and saying, "There's no place like home."
3.25. My guess is that the Chord on the far left is a B-flat.
3. See the hottie in the red dress? Come 10:00, it's schtup 'er time.
2.5. Meet The Cannibals
2.25. Clockwise from left...Future Nun, Dominatrix, Al Choholic, Bottom, Stewardess/Infomercial Model, Crossdresser/Space Taker-upper and Girl most likely to do anything for money.
2. Dad: Hurry up and eat, kids. Gilligan's Island will be on soon, and you know how I feel about the Professor!
1.5. Molester stache provided the Suckotash.
1. Mutton Chops is trying really hard not to stare at his Grammy's perky tits.
C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S and
Hallelujah To ALL The Winners !!!!!
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THE CALVARY CHORDS