While pondering "the meaning of wife" (though I'm not married) and deciding if that second cup of coffee will do wonders for my looks, I noticed that comedywhirled is on the verge of its 200th member. My sources tell me it could be either former President George W. Bush or Theodore Dewberry.
I'm leaning towards Dewberry. If he does decide to sign up here, the following might be a preview of his profile.
So, sit back, finish dreaming of your neighbor naked, grab a beer or other refreshing beverage of choice and welcome (maybe) the newest member to our whirled...Theodore "Teddy" Dewberry.
Male (on a good day)
- Creamed Liver
- back issues of TV Guide
- playing "Spin The Bottle" with myself
- walking to my Grandmother's grave
- popping ass zits
- morning hard-ons
- when the short bus is late
- getting tasered by my parents
- naked dreams of Mr. Rogers
- when my dad bitch slaps my stuffed animals
I hope I can contribute to your website. I do have some home movies that I will upload. They include...
"Teddy Bare"...where I run through the house naked while holding a Sears catalog and chasing my mom.
"My Trip To Church"...where I run through the church naked while holding a Sears catalog and chasing the pastor.
And my favorite, "Why I Can Never Go Back To Sears"...it shows me stark naked, holding a Sears catalog while chasing 74 year old Sales Clerk Gertrude Wallace (who uses a walker) through the store. I'm still on probation.
There's something about the Sears catalog that makes me take my clothes off and chase people. It might be the meds I take or the voices in my head.
I've done some stand-up, too. Once a week I stand in front of the mirror and recite Rush Limbaugh quotes.
I will also download some music, including Lawrence Welk, David Hasslehoff and Wham.
And, finally, my photo collection is a hoot.
My favorites include...
- my parents and I getting beat up by Skinheads.
- my parents and I being put in an ambulance after getting beat up by Skinheads.
- me receiving mouth-to-mouth after almost drowning in the tub. Check out my Donnie and Marie swim trunks.
- me trying to milk a hamster.
- me throwing up to an episode of "Golden Girls."
So, dudes and dudettes, this could be the 200th member...or not. It will be somebody! Only time will tell.
Thanks for reading!
This blog was brought to you by Gerhardguffaw. Any resemblance of humor was purely coincidental.
And on a sad note, one cup of coffee was harmed in the making of this blog.