Coming very soon is an app/program called iMod®. It will enable idiots to sound literally credible when tweeting their bullshit as well as protect celebrities from themselves. The comment self-moderation tolerances will be adjusted to fit the user's profession. A comedian's will be at 1 or 2 filter strength. Politicians' will be at 8-9 strength, and 10 is reserved for binging addicts and authentic wackos like Leno & Palin. If a power-drunk Palin tweets: "I can see Mexico from my house..." the iMod will translate it to: "We hunted some beautiful Jaguar last Spring in Mexico along the border"
If Weiner tweets his weiner, iMod will send this twit-pic back to him and stop further tweets for 24 hours.
(we're still negotiating with Tazer to offer a micro-sized electrocution device that will fit most phones and computer mice.)
If he tries it again he's twat-blocked until he earns 'counsel credits' by attending our online seminars on intensive behavior modification therapy.(refer to image above as needed)
Technology is either a benefit or a hazard. Let's at least make money off these popularity junkies on their way to self-ruin instead of the other way around. For most people it will just change your 'Fucks' and 'Shits' into 'Florgs' and 'Shazbaats' (or the other way around) when desired. An iMod package will run roughly $99/month, and will include 24 hours(in a row) roadside mobile therapy assistance. Each RMTA is a moderately skilled human being with average common sense. The $99 also covers inappropriate 'facedbook' behavior, putting automatic holds on pictures with flesh tones or the colors red, green, yellow, blue and pink. The iMod® should be available just in time for the fourth Apocalypse of this quarter. (a few select, private shareholder positions are still available prior to launch) PRE-ORDER YOUR iMod Today!