Hundreds of women feared missing in crash
In entertainment news today, it is feared that an estimated 350 to 400 naked women have been lost in a senseless and tragic, blue screen of death computer crash. Names like Britney Spears, Megan Fox, and Polly Holiday are now considered gone forever as a result of this preventable incident. “It is a sad day in my mom’s basement…” said a grieving Doug Greinfeld, 49, of Cooley, Arkansas. Doug, also lifelong resident of his mother’s house continued by saying, “The basement is where I do things like, download pics, go to adult chat rooms, and surf porn sites for a that half minute video preview to masturbate to…you know, that sorta thing. And now it’s all gone!” When asked if any real important data was lost from the computer that crashed he said, “Hell yeah, I bought this E-Machines computer three years ago at Wal-Mart cause it had a ton of hard drive space. It took me nearly the whole three years time to get some real vintage pictures the likes of Cloris Leachman, Joan Collins, and that blond chick who was on ‘The Fall Guy’ TV show.” But of all the pictures he lost which were kept in a file named FAP it was his naked picture of Margot Kidder that he says he will miss the most. “What a bush that lady had back in her day…she was my desktop background.” His friend Todd, who also lives in his folk’s garage, knows a little about computers and has been searching the hard drive for any signs of T & A but has been unsuccessful. Turns out, this catastrophe could have been avoided. Doug had let his internet security software lapse and did not renew the license because he spent his allowance on family size boxes of Hot Pockets from Costco.