(Son is 14, Dad is however old, Mom is also some undetermined age.)
Son: Dad, when will I become a man?
Dad: Well son it's puberty time for you, and when puberty is over you'll be a man.
Son: So when will puberty be over for me?
Dad: For boys it's usually over in the late teens.
Mom: Yes and for girls it may be over a little earlier.
Dad: You shut your mouth! I'm not paying you to talk!
Son: Dad, why are you paying this prostitute to pretend to be mom and what happened to my real mom?
Dad: It's all a part of growing up and becoming a man son, someday you'll understand.
Son: But how will I know I'm done with puberty?
Dad: Shit I don't know son, wait I think that's when you grow your tail. Yeah that's right, when you get your tail that means puberty is over.
Dad: What you didn't get your tail yet? Pssssh!(puts on a pair of aviator's) Loser.