Comedy Whirled

Mellowpuma's Blog – March 2015 Archive (7)

Those Were Different Times #305

Those Were Different Times #305

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and the special "Wow, Just Wow" award goes to:

♫♪♫ "Double your pleasure

Double your fun

I've got 2 mini-sluts

And you have none

One is a prostitute

One is a nun

I shall eat them alive

On a hot-dog bun

Double your pleasure

Double your fun

I just birthed them

Right out of my cun'

Refreshen your life mint

It's the right mint

The…

Continue

Added by mellowpuma on March 31, 2015 at 5:00am — 44 Comments

Those Were Different Times #306

Those Were Different Times #306

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5. "No, let me guess. He's The Chosen One, isn't he? Of course, he is! After all, why wouldn't he be?"

-VomitFlop

She knows it's time for a changing when his

helmet fills and sloshes with urine and feces.

4. His first words were "Danger, Will Robinson!"

-theDIRTYmidget



3. It's so much easier to get your child vaccinated. Stupid hipster…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 31, 2015 at 5:00am — 42 Comments

crap on the barcelona chair & stool we all lust after. because we're chair perverts?

so, some dude wants to sell a chair.  which is fine, except this is not the place to do it.  also, it's a horrible eyesore. also it looks like it'd give anyone a backache.  also screw this guy. let's all tell him how much we hate his chair.

where's the fucking stool, asshole?  …

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Added by mellowpuma on March 31, 2015 at 3:00am — 5 Comments

Those Were Different Times #304

Those Were Different Times #304

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8. She was the only living hair to the Le Pew fortune.

-JJJ23

7. Um, Rachel. It's, "I want to be alone," not, "I want to be a lawn."

-RunSilentRunDeep

6. There is never enough nudity in Alaskan porn movies.

-Gerhardguffaw

Has a plumber on site 24/7.

5. When Cruella was still into Border Collies.

-theDIRTYmidget

4. Having never heard the expression…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 19, 2015 at 9:30am — 54 Comments

Those Were Different Times #303

Those Were Different Times #303

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3. He was so plastered that night!!

-Iverneil

2. "Rung, Forrest, rung!"

-VomitFlop

1. Ladder Day Saint

-Frodoh…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 19, 2015 at 9:30am — 37 Comments

Those Were Different Times #301

Those Were Different Times #301

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8. Staring is caring.

-JJJ23

7. This is Peoples Express, not Penis Express sir.

-Drwho

6. "You must be irish."

-Mervin97

5. Would you like some TWA tea?

-MacSpruce

4. Disco to New York. Dat go to Miami.

-KariGrant

3. "Warm nuts?"

-theDIRTYmidget

2. ♪♫ Moon Me to the Fly ♫♪

-FroDoh

1. ♪♫..And one of there days these boots…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 8, 2015 at 9:30am — 43 Comments

Those Were Different Times #302

Those Were Different Times #302

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9. They could have gone far in life if only they weren't two tired.

-38chrysler

8.34. With considerable time and effort, the Picard family finally managed to make it sew.

8. They got pulled over for tailorgating.

-MacSpruce

7. In Russia the sewing rides you.

-drwho



6. Sew sew sew your bike gently down the…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 8, 2015 at 9:30am — 56 Comments

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