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Mellowpuma's Blog (314)

Those Were Different Times #369

Those Were Different Times #369

Added by mellowpuma on October 17, 2017 at 5:29pm — 15 Comments

Those Were Different Times #368

Those Were Different Times #368

Added by mellowpuma on October 17, 2017 at 5:26pm — 8 Comments

goodbye to my friend theDIRTYmidget.

so, our old friend, Bruce / theDIRTYmiget died.

forum discussion here:  http://comedywhirled.com/forum/topics/tdm-died-general-discussion

i saw it on the front page a few days ago, but just haven't reacted to it yet.  still doesn't seem quite real.

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when it came to writing in general, he was a golden god.   more than a few times i forgot he was a real person,…

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Added by mellowpuma on October 13, 2017 at 9:30am — 13 Comments

Those Were Different Times #367

Those Were Different Times #367

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4. Quick Robin! to the butt plug!

-Iverneil

3. Bathman Begins

-VomitFlop

2. The Dark Knight Rinses

-Mario!!!

1.9. Just lookin' for a dick grazin'.

1. He's in something called the Just Ass League.

JJJ23…

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Added by mellowpuma on September 21, 2017 at 4:00pm — 14 Comments

Those Were Different Times #366

Those Were Different Times #366

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3. You should see her down underwear.

-VomitFlop

2. ...........I'll take "What should Sonny Bono have owned" for $400, Alex.

-MadAdam

1. Does Your Man Want to Try It Carrot Style?

-JJJ23…

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Added by mellowpuma on September 21, 2017 at 4:00pm — 22 Comments

you don't know shit about pavlov

you don't know shit about pavlov

think you know shit about palvlov, well you don't moron. you're a fucking moron when it comes to pavlov. i'm about to drop some pavlov knowledge on your ass, pay attention. asshole.

you know how your cat starts being all twerky when the can opener starts? pavlov noticed that shit with dogs…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 25, 2017 at 4:00pm — 4 Comments

Those Were Different Times #365

Those Were Different Times #365

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6. COPPERS CLOBBER RAINBOW ROBBER!

-MacSpruce

5. Same thing happens if you eat too many Skittles.

-Mario!!!

4. The finest wool, from super gay sheep.

-MadAdam

3. "Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Ken's ass anymore."

-Ian

2. The Leprechaun was like, "oh hell, you can have me gold, just don't touch me again."

-Rotwang

1. Yes officer, that's the…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 20, 2017 at 12:30am — 19 Comments

Those Were Different Times #364

Those Were Different Times #364

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And he was sportin' a hellacious set of Beelzeboobies.

-MadAdam

5. In case you were wondering, yes, the story is loosely based on Fred Haley's ex-wife.

-Mario!!!

4. The horns would suggest he was a 'bull' dyke.

-MacSpruce

3. Looks like Mannix has gotten himself into another fine mess.

-Iverneil

2. Well then what is he now?

-Rotwang

1. Well…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 20, 2017 at 12:30am — 24 Comments

Those Were Different Times #362

Those Were Different Times #362

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5. It's a sad ending. Let's just say the sequel is called Cowboy Boots.

-Rotwang

4. If you've seen him lately, it looks like the Gator got him.

-Iverneil

3. It was all fun and games until he learned he'd got GatorAIDS.

-Mario!!!

2. Also starring Lauren Hutten, an actress best known for holding the record of "Worlds Shortest Asscrack".

-MadAdam

1. Spoiler Alert:…

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Added by mellowpuma on July 29, 2017 at 2:30pm — 16 Comments

Those Were Different Times #363

Those Were Different Times #363

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5. He was a Seminole in college, which is equally awful.

-JJJ23

4. If you're a fan, you should really check out the director's cut on Blu-ray. It has deleted scenes, commentary by Sergio Corbucci and 35% more racism.

-Mario!!!

3. I went to go see it but they told me I needed Reservations

-Iverneil

2. I love the part where Chief Soaring T. Justice say's "Junior, when we…

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Added by mellowpuma on July 29, 2017 at 2:30pm — 12 Comments

Those Were Different Times #361

Those Were Different Times #361

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3. They were very fashionable until a coed drowned in her vomit.

-RoadKillHairPiece

2. They enjoy coneilingus

-Iverneil

1. The Pointier Sisters

-MacSpruce…

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Added by mellowpuma on June 22, 2017 at 1:00pm — 21 Comments

Those Were Different Times #360

Those Were Different Times #360

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Its his fifth book, He started with "How to Date Supermodels"

5. Spurned over his facial psoriasis condition, Larry picked up what he thought said "How to pick up Rashy women"

-Iverneil

4. The Silence of the Gams

-Rotwang

3.  Trying to pretend you're Zorro won't do it.

-RoadKillHairPiece

Like a six-pack – with your thumb and middle finger...

2.  Just refuse…

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Added by mellowpuma on June 22, 2017 at 1:00pm — 20 Comments

Those Were Different Times #359

Those Were Different Times #359

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and the special I'M HERE TO ASK YOU ONE QUESTION, AND ONE QUESTION ONLY.  ANIMATIONS??? award goes to:

-MacSpruce



6. Hey!... My Eyes Are Up Here...

-38chrysler

5. Early female super heroes really got the short…

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Added by mellowpuma on April 11, 2017 at 8:30pm — 28 Comments

Those Were Different Times #358

Those Were Different Times #358

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4. I Like Big Bulbs and I Can Not Lie...

-38shrysler

3. Wow, Those lights are even inflating my inner tube

-Iverneil

2.87. If you were fortunate enough to remove her asbestos bra, you were blinded by her beauty.

2. As she got older, her headlamps were referred to as waistlamps.

-RoadKillHairPiece

1. Alright honey, I got the antlers attached to my head now run at me…

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Added by mellowpuma on April 11, 2017 at 8:30pm — 28 Comments

Those Were Different Times #357

Those Were Different Times #357

Results: 

and the special Inside Scoop Award goes to:

"Give this to aunt Harriet, and..."

"Who?"

"Aunt Harriet"

"Huh..."

-RunSilent RunDeep

3. Bat Bites – An important source of rabies

-MacSpruce

2. "No thanks, Batman! Just give me a pound of bacon and a hooker!"

-Gerhardguffaw

1. Was Robin Berries too implausible?

-VomitFlop…

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Added by mellowpuma on April 11, 2017 at 8:30pm — 23 Comments

Those Were Different Times #355

Those Were Different Times #355

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5. "You morons. It says clearly on the bottle for ages 7 to Up."

-VomitFlop

4. He smiled right up to the explosion

-Iverneil

3. Oh what a cute little sprite he isn't.

-Rotwang

2. When asked by a group of parents what the "it" that it "does" was 7up responded that they couldn't disclose that information, but that if your child has begun drinking 7up he or she should…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 9, 2017 at 9:00pm — 19 Comments

Those Were Different Times #356

Those Were Different Times #356

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5. Masturbaters in hell, son, that's what.

-Rotwang

4.8. "Well, son, no matter what your older brother keeps saying, it's not his mixtape."

4. "What is with you & all these rhetorical questions?"

-VomitFlop

3. Napalm son, but I don't want to talk about it.

-Iverneil



2.75. Your mother's lies.

2. It's fueled by my disappointment in you, now eat your fucking…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 9, 2017 at 9:00pm — 36 Comments

Those Were Different Times #354

Those Were Different Times #354

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6. When you're done beatin' the monkey, why don't we head over yonder and milk the cow.

-RoadKillHairPiece

5. Cleetus Tucker: Captain of the 1954 Arkansas State Varsity Hambone and Spanking Team

-Mario!!

4. Wally lettered in Monkey Business.

-Gerhardguffaw

3. So you're a Rebel, I'm impressed

-Iverneil

2. "I don't think that's gonna make George less…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 9, 2017 at 9:00pm — 25 Comments

Those Were Different Times #351

Those Were Different Times #351

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8. Even though he couldn't skate, Salvador could do a mean Figure 8.Even though he couldn't skate, Salvador could do a mean Figure 8.

-Gerardguffaw

7. I mustache you a question... Does this make me look stupid?

-38chrysler

6. There's no way it's 8 o'clock, that thing's broken.

-JJJ23

5. All Dali'ed up and nowhere to go

-Iverneil

4. One of the infinite…

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Added by mellowpuma on February 17, 2017 at 1:30pm — 19 Comments

Those Were Different Times #353

Those Were Different Times #353

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6. And stay there because you died.

-JJJ23

5.9. Coughalung Cassidy

5.6. Dude is always hanging around that Rest Stop

5. Come to marble row.

-iverneil

4. Enjoys the company of chaps over women.

-Gerhardguffaw

3. Smokepack Mountain

-VomitFlop

2.1. His pickup line is: One lung but well hung.

2. Says the purpose of lungs is…

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Added by mellowpuma on February 17, 2017 at 1:30pm — 17 Comments

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