The biggest, baddest member of the legume family, other beans tremble in terror when a lima is around. Continue
And not content to just bully around other beans, limas have been known to take out their aggression on people too. In fact, this is where the phrase “opening up a can of whoop-ass” comes from. Some housewife was opening a can of lima beans…
Added by Bubba Licious on September 1, 2010 at 11:02am —
Wall Street had its hands full at the opening bell on Monday with the surprise news that General Motors (… Continue
Added by CHN on August 31, 2010 at 10:30pm —
My first working title for this piece of pea prose was "Whirled Peas." But, I decided I might be stepping on our illustrious hosts' toes, so I went ahead and changed it. I never want it said I don't know how to mind my peas and q's.
So, let's get started, shall we? If you don a badge, and carry a pea shooter, does that make you a Peas Officer? Or maybe a Justice of the Peas?
I love peas. I really do.… Continue
Added by Bubba Licious on August 31, 2010 at 6:36pm —
It's Saturday evening and I'm deciding what my options are....Lawrence Welk, porn or Lean Cuisine. I was leaning toward Mr. Welk when all of a sudden I get an invite to join comedywhirled.com. I thought to myself..."Self, you never get invited to anything." Could this be a joke? So I decided to check into this further....after Lawrence Welk.
After my fill of bubbles and 60's hairdos, I went to comedywhirled.com. "What the fuck is this?"… Continue
Added by Gerhardguffaw on August 31, 2010 at 2:56pm —
my name is james stewart. go here http://www.facebook.com/#!/profile.php?id=100001052046531
i just use it to say rude things usually.
Added by Stephen Holthouser on August 30, 2010 at 11:30pm —
My previous employer refuses to pay me two-thousand dollars that I am owed. Continue
I was thinking of filling a small claims law suit and was leaving home to do so, I noticed someone broke into my car and tore the dash out of it to steal my stylish 1996 C.D. Player? I had more valuable stuff in the seat? Oh well wait, this isn’t a cry baby blog…. No sir. I’m not down. In fact I was thinking of taking up Bull fighting. (not really I hate animal blood sports) How do you turn a frown upside…
Added by grizz (Raymond J. Carrington) on August 30, 2010 at 4:34pm —
Life with Grumpy : A Comedy Whirled Exclusive Well, here goes.
Grumpy’s first BLOG post on Comedy Whirled.
Upon returning from Las Vegas I began a series of BLOGS on that other site relating to some of our funny experiences. I do plan to complete that series because I know you want to know about the most exhilarating “Ride” Jimbo ever had, particularly because this happened in Vegas. Actually, that one will be a Three Part Extravaganza, and will provide the… Continue
Added by jimbobalouie on August 30, 2010 at 11:00am —
The WNBA - pondering their existence for 13+ years
Who wants to see a group of homely women running around shooting lay-ups and jump shots? Am I supposed to be amazed that a woman who's 7'1" can dunk a ball with two hands? I don't know a single person who watches or follows the WNBA, the arenas are always less than half full, so how, especially in a recession, can… Continue
Added by J.B. on August 30, 2010 at 7:00am —
To create a group, go to the Groups tab and click the link at the topright of the page to "Add a group." Next, fill in information about your group.
Give your group a name and be sure to upload a group imagethat's roughly square in size. Fill out a description for your… Continue
Added by GOZER on August 29, 2010 at 7:30pm —
I'm friending everyone new that comes along...
I'm the Comedy Whirled Slut!!!
I feel all sticky....… Continue
Added by chad cook on August 29, 2010 at 8:39am —
I can see clearly now!
Added by Codename: Spydergirl on August 29, 2010 at 7:10am —
Has anyone noticed Michael Jordan's Hitler mustache? Has he joined the Nazi ranks? Maybe he changed the toner on his copier and then raised his hand to ponder something.… Continue
Added by chuckkling on August 28, 2010 at 5:30pm —
Depending on the browser you use you may have difficulty logging in.
HERE'S HOW TO GET AROUND THAT PESKY 'incorrect Password' loop:
First, log out of any other networks first. Including any other comedy site networks.
THEN TRY LOGGING IN. If that doesn't work, try the following:Just click: "Forgot Your Password" and then follow the instructions.… Continue
Added by GOZER on August 28, 2010 at 3:00pm —
Added by Codename: Spydergirl on August 27, 2010 at 8:56pm —
Rabble-rouser: a leader or speaker who stirs up the passions of the masses
Rubble-rouser: stirring up the passions of Betty Rubble
Added by Bubba Licious on August 27, 2010 at 8:13am —
The keys to a successful collaboration in any medium are a willingness to check your ego at the door and become the loyal servant of the story or painting or motion picture shot. It is easy to be right all the time. To be one's own constructive devil's advocate is the real trick. What separates art from junk is the ability to gather enough patience in order to stay as true to the original vision as possible. It's easy to do something half-way. There's a great line from Thomas Dolby regarding… Continue
Added by GOZER on August 27, 2010 at 1:00am —
Any Basketball Team Sent To Iran Would Be Quickly Crushed Tehran, Iran (CHN)
-- Iran's National Basketball Team is so powerful today that no country would dare challenge it, President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said Sunday
during an annual athletic parade.
"Iran's basketball defenses are
so mighty that no enemy should even have a thought of… Continue
Added by CHN on August 26, 2010 at 9:07pm —
Whenever I get a Capri Sun, my first attempt at straw insertion is always with a quick, hard, almost vengeful stabbing motion. I successfully hit my 1/8th inch target about 70% of the time. I think Capri Sun is subliminally training children to become extremely precise assassins.…
Added by J.B. on August 26, 2010 at 7:50pm —
The first 15 months of my son’s life has brought more joy to me than I could have ever imagined, but last night brought an equal amount of fear to me in one potent dose. It was a little after 2AM, and I was sleeping so heavily that the “big one” could have struck, and I would have still been asleep in the rubble, but something worse than earth movement roused me.
I heard the shout of Satan, pierce through my ears as if someone had inserted two 1/4" drill bits into my ears and pulled… Continue
Added by Krass on August 26, 2010 at 5:18pm —
Radio Host Is Super Apologetic
Santa Barbara, CA (CHN)
- The media storm began on August 10th when nationally syndicated radio host Dr. Laura Schlessinger took a call from a Black American woman.
The caller was upset with how she was being treated by her White husband's friends and… Continue
Added by CHN on August 25, 2010 at 9:00pm —