Comedy Whirled

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Reasons I didn’t get any Valentines:

Already got a few “VD” greetings last month.

Got a ticket for speed dating on The Bachelor.

I mean watching The Bachelor.

Did a “Belly Flop” in the car pool.

Friends don’t let friends Skype drunk.

Didn’t give any put out.

Added by KariGrant on February 16, 2016 at 9:01pm — 4 Comments

2015 Caption Whirled Power Rankings - Final Results

Here are the results for 2015.  Congratulations to AKAAB, who joins MacSpruce and VomitFlop as the only three champions in six years.  Thanks again to everyone who participates!…

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Added by Comedy Whirled on February 14, 2016 at 2:00pm — 10 Comments

Armchair Superbowl Terms

Eyes Chess Goeszeer.

Dannin Front.

Forward Pass Gas.

Battime dePeetza gotteer.

Airsa Gottam Remote?

Bautautta Beer.

Ayydats Natchocheez HAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahahahadam.

F'ur gunnapuke goout.

Need Smore Dreetos.

Sbuds FrU.

Can't bleefwe losss. Better call Saul, er Uber, er smshit like at.

Added by KariGrant on February 7, 2016 at 10:30am — No Comments

Sequelmania

Sequelmania continues in Tinseltown with Groundhog Day meets Starwars in Starwars VIII, “Awaken, hit the snooze. Awaken, hit the snooze.  Awaken, hit the snooze…”

Everyone’s got Star Wars fever, since the long awaited movie’s coming out. Even TV and Cable has gotten Star Wars fever. I saw where Jeff Foxworthy has a new game show out called, “Are you smarter than a Darth Vader.”

The Porn version of Ridealong is out now, called “Ride a Long Hard One.”

Beverly Hills Cop 4,…

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Added by KariGrant on February 4, 2016 at 12:00pm — 33 Comments

Those Were Different Times #324

Those Were Different Times #324

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Results:

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5. Comes complete with the 1,000 mile stare.

-RunSilent RunDeep

4. "If you cock it for more then four hours please see a doctor."

-Mervin97

3. He doesn't have anything…

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Added by mellowpuma on January 12, 2016 at 6:30pm — 22 Comments

Those Were Different Times #323

Those Were Different Times #323

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Results:

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2, Miss Pesticide 1947

-MacSpruce

1. Hillary has already picked out her Interns for the White House.

-3*Chrysler…

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Added by mellowpuma on January 12, 2016 at 6:30pm — 17 Comments

Happy New Year!!!

Here's wishing all my friends and cohorts here at the CW a Happy and Joyous New Year!

I will start out by saying ya'll were amazing in this past year with all your Captions, Photo Creations, Blogs and comments.  There is so much talent here that I feel blessed to be counted as friends with you.  You have brought much laughter and insight into these fragile shells we call humans.  You have raised my spirits in times of loss and sorrow this past year and I wish to thank…

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Added by 38chrysler on December 30, 2015 at 10:30pm — 4 Comments

'Kardashian Woman' (now with video) - A Parody of Guess Who's 'American Woman'

It's a parody I'd done in March or April with a new video cobbled together today:…

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Added by Frodoh on December 20, 2015 at 7:30pm — 2 Comments

♪♫ Say, Where'd Twenty-Fifteen Go? ♫♪ A Recap of 2015 to Somewhere Over the Rainbow

     Per usual, 2015 provided us with…

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Added by Frodoh on December 15, 2015 at 11:30am — 2 Comments

Let's Let trump Trump trump.

(the great and powerful wizard of odd)

In 2011 donald trump, while limply considering a run for president, floated two very bad ideas at a speech in Las Vegas. His first horrible idea consisted of more or less renting out our military and servicemen.  His second worst idea that night was taking the oil from Iraq, as some sort of bizarre conquest prize. Just let that marinate for a…

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Added by mellowpuma on December 12, 2015 at 10:30am — 5 Comments

More Stuff Found After Dr. Seuss Died.

Channeled poem from beyond the grave:

"I do not like it in this box.

I do not like it, without locks.

I do not like the big backhoe.

I do not like him. Make him go."

Things he was writing when he died...not sure which was the last thing he penned...

"My hearing went when I went to hear The Who."

"I have something stuck in my Lorax."

"One fish, two fish. Red fish, blue lips."

Added by KariGrant on December 4, 2015 at 9:10am — 3 Comments

Those Were Different Times #321

Those Were Different Times #321

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Results:

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... and the "Keeping The Meme Alive Award" goes to:

"In Soviet Russia, zoo visits you."

-Ian Renga



4.348. Flake off ya beast, you're nothing but a carniboor.

4. The Jewish women recoiled at the sight of Gentile Ben.

-Iverneil

3. Hey,I bearly bumped you, lady!!

-KariGrant

2.874. It was disappointing all around – they were expecting Bear…

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Added by mellowpuma on December 4, 2015 at 3:00am — 26 Comments

Those Were Different Times #322

Those Were Different Times #322

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Results:

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6. Groin To Be Wild

-Gerardguffaw

5. Soon after this unfortunate incident, Dylan would be dancing with the scars.

-VomitFlop

4. Catch crotch fever

-Mervin97

3. Chick Fell-A-tio

-Mike McHuman

2. American Glandstand

-MacSpruce

1. Taking a leap of face.

-Rotwang…

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Added by mellowpuma on December 4, 2015 at 3:00am — 32 Comments

Ways to show your solidarity with France

Eat more:

French Fries, French Bread, French Onion Soup, Croutons.

Put in a French Drain

Install French Doors

French Kiss

Use French Ticklers,

Can-Can through the office,

Drive a Citroën

Get a French Manicure

Added by KariGrant on November 16, 2015 at 9:30am — 6 Comments

Merry Christmas Dammit



Okay, after spending the last hour designing this cup for all of the angry people who call themselves Christians, I find out that Bill O'Reilly doesn't have a problem with the red Starbucks holiday cups. But that's not going to stop me from publishing the prince of pomposity on his very own cup.…

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Added by Mike McHuman on November 11, 2015 at 11:06pm — 10 Comments

Those Were Different Times #320

Those Were Different Times #320

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Results:

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5.. Bonnet & Clyde

-VomitFlop

4. The Dune Buggy prototype wasn't a complete success. For one thing, the rollbar was too high.

-Mike McHuman

3. ...and then the ants came, and well, there was a lot of explaining to do at the funeral.

-JJJ23

2.223. Leave it to Weaver

2. They kept weaving in and out of traffic

-Iverneil

1.almost. Something Wicker Comes…

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Added by mellowpuma on November 10, 2015 at 3:00pm — 36 Comments

Those Were Different Times #319

Those Were Different Times #319

Results:

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6. Who needs viagara when you can just harden your arteries with lard?

-drwho

5. It's been a lard day's night...

-Gerhardguffaw

4. Get a room you three.

-Mike McHuman

3. It's life shortening. (Get it?)

_MacSpruce

2. Britain: We Don't Know What Food Is!

-JJJ23

1.999.  Care for a touch of the blubbery my dear?

1. They're not eating…

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Added by mellowpuma on November 10, 2015 at 3:00pm — 26 Comments

PUMPKINFERNO 2015

Past PUMKINFERNOS:

2014…

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Added by mellowpuma on October 31, 2015 at 1:25pm — 2 Comments

♪♫ Super-Creepy-Make-'em-Sleepy-Comic-Connin'-Cosby! ♫♪

Here's a little ditty inspired by Bill Cosby's decades of  'shenanigans'…

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Added by Frodoh on October 25, 2015 at 6:30pm — 3 Comments

Those Were Different Times #317

Those Were Different Times #317

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Results:

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And the "Forensic Evidence Analysis Award" goes to:

Seven Shamurai

-MacSpruce

[even with high speed film, if they were moving there should be some motion blur in the background or the ground itself.  you can see individual rocks in the pavement.]

5. "Look out! It's the dreaded Russian Nesting Drivers!"

-VomitFlop

4. Cirque du Soiled Pants

-Gerhardguffaw

3. The…

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Added by mellowpuma on September 28, 2015 at 3:00am — 34 Comments

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