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Those Were Different Times #403

Those Were Different Times #403

Added by mellowpuma on May 15, 2019 at 3:27am — 16 Comments

Those Were Different Times #402

Those Were Different Times #402

Added by mellowpuma on May 15, 2019 at 3:26am — 14 Comments

How Dragons Produce Fire

With the final season of Game of Thrones fast approaching it's important to understand exactly how a dragon produces fire.

Calling them 'Fire-breathing' is not entirely accurate.  Call them 'Fire-exhaling' Dragons to be more precise.

Much like the monkeys that eat the charcoal for digestion, dragons regularly seek out flint and marcasite-rich…

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Added by Ian on March 29, 2019 at 9:00pm — 8 Comments

Those Were Different Times #401

Those Were Different Times #401

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5. "Fifty NOs and a YES means YES."

-Ian

4. She would later star in the sequel, Dr. No Means No!

-Mario!!!

3. ♫Fieldings. Nothing more than ♫ fieldings...

-Karigrant

2. Song 1: We're Not A Great Spy Team

-JJJ23

1. When he shakes her she doesn't stir – the good old Cosby martini!

-MacSpruce    (oof, that's hard)…

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Added by mellowpuma on February 14, 2019 at 12:30pm — 20 Comments

Those Were Different Times #400

Those Were Different Times #400

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4, The Incredible Husk.

-Karigrant

3. The real reason Dr Frankenstein's monster went ballistic, this was his junk.

-Mervin97

2, Do you guys have any idea how many "rotten wang" caps I'm not typing?

-rotwang

1. Then Dorothy asked “But scarecrow!! I thought you wanted a heart??”

-iverneil…

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Added by mellowpuma on February 14, 2019 at 12:00pm — 19 Comments

Those Were Different Times #399

Those Were Different Times #399

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3,"Stop trying to brainwash us with the power of suggestion, Oliver Stone!"

-VomitFlop

2. Sure it's effective, but it does require quite a lot of self-amputation.

-Mario!!!

1. "...I'm going to say one word: Plastics. That's all you're allowed to eat now."

-Ian…

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Added by mellowpuma on January 13, 2019 at 3:30am — 20 Comments

Those Were Different Times #398

Those Were Different Times #398

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3. That game received a very spoor rating.

-Iverneil

"Well, the thing is, they aren't exactly being propelled by jetpacks."

"Also coming soon to the Smegma Genesis!"

2. Pooper Mario Bros.

-VomitFlop

No one messes with this powerful squat. -I mean squad.

1. That's it, private, you are relieved of your dookie!

-Rotwang…

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Added by mellowpuma on January 13, 2019 at 1:00am — 17 Comments

Those Were Different Times #397

Those Were Different Times #397

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When it came to spreading Christmas Cheer, they really phoned it in back in the Fifties.

4. Not to be confused with "Hanukkah up Your Ass."

-Mario!!!

"Pardon me, sir, but what is a Jerky boy?"

3. "CF phone home."

-VomitFlop

2. ...would prove to be the cause of death, clogging both the aorta and the jugular with pine needles, bits of glass ornaments and eggnog.

-Ian

1. "I…

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Added by mellowpuma on December 23, 2018 at 10:00pm — 15 Comments

Those Were Different Times #396

Those Were Different Times #396

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--- a blue christmas ... ---

3. He had a round little belly that shook when he laughed like a bowl full of jizz.

-KariGrant

It was Santa's last stop of the night and he emptied his sack.

2. Santa always comes in December, and sometimes he comes in Mae.

-MacSpruce

1. ♪ Don't stand so Claus to me. ♪

-VomitFlop…

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Added by mellowpuma on December 23, 2018 at 10:00pm — 16 Comments

Gremlins 3 (Notes for a proper sequel treatment)

Rumor has it the new Gremlins 3 script is a reboot.  Here are some quick notes for a treatment of Gremlins 3 as if it were a proper sequel:…

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Added by Ian on November 23, 2018 at 4:30pm — 7 Comments

Those Were Different Times #395

Those Were Different Times #395

4. "Yes, there were giant toilet paper rolls in space."

-Ian

3. One small step for man-on-mankind.

-Rotwang

2. Featuring the Yiddish hit, "Somewhere Oy Vey, the Rainbow.

-KariGrant

1. From the folks who brought you George S. Patton Ocean Cloud Pancakes.

-JJJ23…

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Added by mellowpuma on October 30, 2018 at 6:30am — 15 Comments

Those Were Different Times #394

Those Were Different Times #394

Results:

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5. No more piano lessons, mom.

-Rotwang



4. Even after fully militarizing in the streets the spotlight continued to elude Kane.

-Ian

3. Featuring the hit' "I've Never Heard Of This Rambo Character, I have No Idea What You're Talking About" and the the ballad "Second Blood".

-JJJ23



2. Sorry no shirt no solo.

-Mervin97



1.0001. Gland on the…

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Added by mellowpuma on October 30, 2018 at 6:00am — 15 Comments

Songs For TayTay...

Now that Taylor Swift has stopped being just a song writer and musician and has jumped into Partisan Politics alienating 1/2 of her Fan Base I have decided she may need some help with new Song Titles that align with hers and their Platforms... 

You should add your own Song Title suggestions to help her along on her new journey as a Political…

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Added by 38chrysler on October 9, 2018 at 12:00pm — 51 Comments

A Summary of the Kavanaugh Hearing by a Victim of Fraternity Rush Week Roof to Pool Diving Circa 1983

A Summary of the Kavanaugh Hearing by a Victim of Fraternity Rush Week Roof to Pool Diving Circa 1983



so a bunch of nerd senators are going after kdog because of some weird female hysteria.

 

then it's like, ok, she seemed scared when she was talking to the…

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Added by mellowpuma on September 30, 2018 at 4:30pm — 4 Comments

Those Were Different Times #393

Those Were Different Times #393

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3. "I hope you like chamber music."

-Ian

2. Don't come a-knockin' if the coffin is rockin'. 

-MacSpruce
1.

Buried With Children

-Mario!!!

Added by mellowpuma on September 25, 2018 at 4:30am — 16 Comments

Those Were Different Times #392

Those Were Different Times #392

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3. It'll give you a tromboner!

-Mario!!!

2. "Now includes Music to Watch Large Girls By featuring Sal Iva on Tuba."

-Ian

Trumpets for Strumpets

1. aka Herpes Alpert and the Gonorrhea Brass

-MacSpruce…

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Added by mellowpuma on September 25, 2018 at 4:00am — 15 Comments

Those Were Different Times #391

Those Were Different Times #391

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4. Even if you only listen to it once, you have to register as a sex offender.

-Mario!!!

3. It's like a few minutes of wet slapping.It's like a few minutes of wet slapping.

-jjj23

Organ ickily grown

2. Some of the tunes have words, others are hummers.

 -MacSpruce

1. *all the compositions in the songbook are written to be played with only one…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 22, 2018 at 1:00am — 18 Comments

Those Were Different Times #390

Those Were Different Times #390

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2. For everyone's sake it's better than being the gassy giant.

-Mervin97Oh,

1.5. he's friendly alright. I see he's fondling Twin Peaks again. And the less said about that episode with the lighthouse, the better. 

1. You misunderstood; I didn't say he showers the village with gold …-macspruce…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 22, 2018 at 12:30am — 18 Comments

Those Were Different Times #389

Those Were Different Times #389

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and the special "Oof" award goes to:

Sure, he tried to look like he was all business, but everyone could tell Gary was a total phoney.

-Mario!!!



Unfortunately for Gary, business was no longer interested in getting down with him.

2, "So, who the fuck were you before you went into that phone booth?"

-VomitFlop

Putting a gloryhole in a…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 11, 2018 at 4:30am — 15 Comments

Those Were Different Times #388

Those Were Different Times #388

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4. Such "happy occasions" include searching for the real killers.

-JJJ23



♪ ♫ ♬ When the blade hits your eye just like a pizza pie there's more of you eh? ♪ ♫ ♬

"Hey Cake, Pizza and Watermelon, come over here and play with me!

3. ""Only the penitent man may pass."

-Ian



2. The Stab never caught on like the Twist or the Mashed Potato, probably…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 11, 2018 at 4:30am — 31 Comments

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