Comedy Whirled

October 2012 Blog Posts (16)

Nobody Jack-0-Lanterns like the mellowpuma

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Added by mellowpuma on October 31, 2012 at 4:28pm — 5 Comments

What Sucks about Trick or Treating in the Big Apple

Wet popcorn balls.

Floating Baby Ruths are not Baby Ruths.

Getting to the next house.

Dodging debris.

Mom won't let you use the flashlight. Mom's special flashlight. The one that hums.

The man in 6B always flashes you for "the treat."

You can't swim.

Roaches can swim.

After eating your treats, mom makes you wait thirty minutes before going out to play.

Mandatory evacuation.

Added by KariGrant on October 29, 2012 at 9:30am — 20 Comments

RESULTS: CASTRO DOES NEW YORK, 1959 EDITION

 

Cohiba Pirámides Extra:

Ian Renga..."We've secretly replaced Fidel's cigar with a Hebrew National. Let's see…

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Added by Buttermilk on October 29, 2012 at 5:14am — No Comments

Games for Halloween Parties:

Bobbing for plums in the hot tub.

Pass the hair.

Guess what’s dripping in the box.

Guess what’s that smell?

Decomposing music.

Chutes and body bags.

Trivial pursuit of another victim.

Tag, you’re next.

Hide and try not to whimper.

Guess the pizza ingredients.

Added by KariGrant on October 25, 2012 at 12:50pm — 18 Comments

Things you can do with a pumpkin:

Pretend you’re pregnant.

Pretend you’re birthing a baby.

Pretend you’re Quasimoto.

Tie it to your foot and walk awkwardly.

Use guts of it to pretend you’re puking.

Decent catapult ammo.

Use for an “other world” globe.

Drop from tall buildings and let gravity make sidewalk art.

Experiment with electricity.

Makes a good punch bowl.

Makes a bad aquarium.

Added by KariGrant on October 23, 2012 at 7:59am — 10 Comments

Very Punny

Use one of the words below in a pun.

Spine               grouper          savage

incensed          melody           jugular

Mallard            charter           hermaphrodite

alfredo             bomber          translucent

leper               angst               pearly

chipolte           omelette         menstrual

 

Ex: While god was staring down on the jellyfish he was creating,, the jellyfish looked up…

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Added by Iverneil on October 22, 2012 at 5:59pm — 69 Comments

THEY SAID WHAT?? CASTRO DOES NEW YORK, 1959 EDITION

Bronx Zoo, 1959…

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Added by Buttermilk on October 22, 2012 at 5:15am — 26 Comments

Less Popular Halloween Costumes

Blueberry Pop-tart with a Third Eye.

Gingivitis.

ET with VD.

Count Crackulahead.

Hello, Rabid Kitty.

Tweety Turd.

Super-pimple.

Raggedy Yam.

My Little Pirannah.

Frankenbenstein.

Added by KariGrant on October 21, 2012 at 7:47pm — 21 Comments

Chuck's Mystery Cap Contest #6

I will post my picture and mystery cap here. Each day I will reveal a letter. The first to guess gets their name on the Mystery Cap Board.

Chuck's Mystery Cap - If yo* *av* **me ** **an *o* h*** t*m* t*…

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Added by chuckkling on October 21, 2012 at 10:30am — 12 Comments

Sextape Comedy

Hey guys,

check out our sketches at www.sextapecomedy.com.

Love,

Sextape

Added by Sextape Comedy on October 20, 2012 at 9:18am — No Comments

RESULTS: JOAN CRAWFORD/BETTE DAVIS EDITION

RESULTS…

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Added by Buttermilk on October 20, 2012 at 3:57am — No Comments

Other endorsements Lance lost

His own, on the backs of Nike checks.

Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Dopey at Disneyworld.

No longer Bicycle Spokesman. Now Spokes man at Arnold's Bike repair shop.

Chuck Norris.

Cancer. Still has endorsement from Scorpio and two attaboys from Saggitarius.

Michelin.

Air.

Now only touring Franks & Buns.

Lindsey Lohan.

The Dirty Midget.

 

Added by KariGrant on October 17, 2012 at 11:03pm — 11 Comments

Felix Baumgartner Record-Setting Jump's alternate landing sites

Atop the Comedy Whirled Blimp.

Big Mama's Ass.

A deep vat of Jello.

The Hershey factory.

Three Mile Island.

Ben & Jerry's.

Miley's sex tape #2.

The Serta factory.

Budweiser's #43 vat.

The set of Cupcake Wars.

Added by KariGrant on October 14, 2012 at 2:58pm — 33 Comments

THEY SAID WHAT?? BETTE DAVIS & JOAN CRAWFORD EDITION

 …

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Added by Buttermilk on October 13, 2012 at 6:45am — 12 Comments

Rejected Music for Films:

Pinworms from Heaven,

Stingin’ in the Rain,

Somewhere Over the Tebow,

If I Were a Bitch, Man, 

The Sound of Muzak,

Puttin’ on the Rinse,

Stink the Bismark,

Manshattan,

Stormy Tether,

Porn Free,

Added by KariGrant on October 4, 2012 at 9:47am — 17 Comments

Things October Doesn't Celebrate

October Fist.

October Fistula.

October Vest.

October Faust.

October Foot.

October Floyd.

October Fuse.

October Noodle.

October Fracking.

October Zoning.

Added by KariGrant on October 2, 2012 at 7:02pm — 12 Comments

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