Comedy Whirled

August 2012 Blog Posts (8)

Why can't boys just get fucking pregnant already?!

“So I took a pregnancy test to calm myself down, and then got my period two days later.”

“Natalie, why are you telling me this?”

“Because you wanted a close and open relationship with your daughter and that is what you got, god damnit! And it was stressing me the fuck out!”

“Don’t say god damnit.”

“Fine.”

“And you are getting on the pill immediately, god damnit!”

“Fine.”

As some of you may know, the pill freaks me the fuck out. Come on. It…

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Added by natalie paige on August 31, 2012 at 10:47am — 2 Comments

RESULTS: 2012 LONDON OLYMPICS EDITION

RESULTS: "THEY SAID…

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Added by Buttermilk on August 29, 2012 at 5:19pm — No Comments

Those Were Different Times #188

Those Were Different Times #188

Introducing: JOHN FRANCIS et LES RELAX   “ecoute ce disque”

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Results:

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and the award for "Best Use of Foreign Language in an Incredibly Dirty Context" goes to:

Originally released as s'asseoir sur mon visage by JOAN FRANCIS et LESB RELAX

-MacSpruce

3. Regarde' sa chesticles

-Jams3kds

2. Featuring a duet with Patsy Recline.

-Butermilk

1. Featuring "The boy's say my…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 27, 2012 at 9:30pm — 8 Comments

Those Were Different Times #187

 Those Were Different Times #187

Introducing: "Wayne Cochran Goin' back to Miami"

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Results:

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4. To finish my transformation into a beluga whale

-Iverneil

3. They won't let Wayne go back to Tampa and he knows why.

-JJJ23



2. ...because maintaining his coif requires a Miami Vice

-FroDoh!

1.7 ... to murder his stylist

1.6 The carpet outsizes the drapes.

1.5... the only place they sell…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 20, 2012 at 1:00am — 27 Comments

2012 Caption Whirled Power Rankings - Update

 

 

3 points for Gold, 2 for Silver and 1 for Bronze

 …

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Added by Comedy Whirled on August 11, 2012 at 4:30pm — 1 Comment

Those Were Different Times #186

Those Were Different Times #186

Introducing: "Dan Grary Lady's Fancy"

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(awesome) Results:

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4. Remembered for the hit "Nuclear Test Site Blues"

-JJJ23

3. featuring the timeless hit...Comb over here my love

-Jams3kids

2. #1 Hit: "Sadie Hawkins is a cunt"

-Iverneil

1. "Listen, Dan Gary was the guy who wouldn't pay the prostitutes, I'm Dan Grary!"

-JJJ23…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 10, 2012 at 11:30pm — 8 Comments

Those Were Different Times #185: The Alaspooryoricabration!

Those Were Different Times #185: The Alaspooryoricabration!

Introducing:"GEMART PRESENTS PLANET BOOTY"

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Resutls:

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1. 

-Ian Renga…

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Added by mellowpuma on August 7, 2012 at 7:00pm — 4 Comments

Reasons for Curiosity to land on Mars

To kill the cat.

To establish an upload feed for ESPN.

To further define string theory, the rover will be clipping samples of martian string.

To find cool stuff.

Look for love in all the wrong places.

Had to go. Received Martian transmission which translated to "Red Rover, Red Rover, let Curiosity come over." 

Checking out possible locations for 7-11s and Sonics.

To establish the first martian NBA team.

Find me some Martian…

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Added by KariGrant on August 5, 2012 at 9:34pm — 23 Comments

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