Comedy Whirled

March 2012 Blog Posts (35)

New Degree Programs for the Fall

Liberal Farts,

Criminal Arts,

Culinary Car-jacking,

Political Wheel Alignment,

No-accounting,

Counter-terrorism at Fast Food Restaurants,

WMD Spin-doctorate,

Paralethal,

Pubic Health,

Web Punishing,

Added by KariGrant on March 29, 2012 at 1:43pm — 13 Comments

Songs for Circus Time

Paint Your Mason,

That Diarrhea Made It A Flying Crapeze,

Nothin’ Could Be Finer Than The Little Cars for Shriners In The Mo-o-orning!

Beeyonsay’s Love My Big Top,

Prancin’ Away with My Horse,

A Dumbo Like You,

Somebody That I Used to Know Was a Bad Animal Tamer,

Where Love Lasts Forever, Knife Throwers Assistants Don’t,  

Beee Geeees’ Knife, Cleaver, Knife,

The Roar of the Clownpaint, The Smell of the Roustabouts,

Added by KariGrant on March 28, 2012 at 3:00pm — No Comments

ALIEN MOVIES

ALIEN,

ALIEN RESURRECTION,

ALIEN VS PREDATOR,

AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON,

COWBOYS VS ALIENS,

GREEN CARD,

MIDNIGHT EXPRESS,

THE ACCIDENTAL TOURIST,

THE DEVIL’S OWN,

THE LONG, LONG TRAILER,

Added by KariGrant on March 27, 2012 at 3:11pm — 12 Comments

Nuclear Summit Goals

1. All parties must learn to correctly pronounce the word, "NUCLEAR."

2. All parties must learn to correctly pronounce the word, "NUCLEAR."

3. All parties must learn to correctly pronounce the word, "NUCLEAR."

4. All parties must learn to correctly pronounce the word, "NUCLEAR."

5. All parties must learn to correctly pronounce the word, "NUCLEAR."

6. All parties must learn to correctly pronounce the word, "NUCLEAR."

7. All parties must learn to…

Continue

Added by KariGrant on March 25, 2012 at 9:33pm — 4 Comments

Stuff That Is or Was Intense

DMZs,

Run DMC,

Dances with Wolves,

Truck Load of Electronics Sale,

Three Rings,

Revivals,

Cavalry,

My last Root Canal,

Safe House car scenes,

A really big spider that I think hisses,

Added by KariGrant on March 25, 2012 at 9:28pm — 6 Comments

Those Were Different Times #170: The Questionabration!

Those Were Different Times #170: The Questionabration!

Introducing ... one I've had in the hopper for some time now: MYSTERY MAN "What's Wrong With Our Love?"

-----------------------------

Results:

-----------------------------



4. How much time have you got?

-MacSpruce

3, If you have to ask I'm not gonna tell you.

-LL Bein

2. It dare not speak its name.

-MacSpruce

1. First answer this, who the fuck are…

Continue

Added by mellowpuma on March 24, 2012 at 12:30am — 14 Comments

O P I Nail colors (currently unavailable)

Opi Orange,

Andy Taylor Tangerine,

Pyle Passionfruit,

Red Barney,

Otis Opal,

Goober Grape,

Mayberry,

Aunt Beeutiful Bisque,

Crump Crimson,

Thelma Lou Lavender,

Added by KariGrant on March 23, 2012 at 8:11pm — 1 Comment

Oh what's that? You want political humor that's actually funny?

Well alrighty then! Just check out... The Final Edition !!!!!!

And you know if I'm saying its funny, then it definitely is.

They've also got a radio show guys and gals! Here's just a snip of their awesomeness:

http://soundcloud.com/thefinaledition/public-radios-next-mike-daisey

Added by natalie paige on March 23, 2012 at 3:21pm — 1 Comment

What It Was Before It Was The Easter Bunny

The Easter Brachiosaurus,

The Easter Lemming,

The Easter Thumb,

The Easter Wheel,

The Easter Pouch,

The Easter Pickle,

The Easter Pumice,

The Easter Moss,

The Easter Comedian,

The Easter Douche,

 

Added by KariGrant on March 21, 2012 at 11:30am — 11 Comments

Signs That It’s Spring or You’re Near a Spring

March comes in like a Lyin’ Bastard.

Somebuny eggs your front lawn.

It’s raining men.

You’re babbling again.

Fort Lauderdale took your mug shot.

Spring break ends. Gives your liver time to heal before the Summer.

Amelia Earhart’s plane is found inside a crashed UFO in Area 51.

Grass stains on your lips.

The swallows come back to the Capistrano bus terminal men’s room.

All the chicks are tweeting.

Added by KariGrant on March 20, 2012 at 2:34pm — 6 Comments

Bette Davis did NOT say this!

Bette Davis had a LOT of famous quotes. These, however, are things she did NOT say:

"The golden Schnapple devoured makes one pee. It is endless."

"I never did pal around with Taxidermists. Their talk usually bored me to tears. Plus, they smell."

"I was Marlon Brando."

"I will never be below the tile."

"I'd love to kiss ya, but I just washed my toes."

"Acting should be bigger than life. Scripts should be bigger than life. Penises should be bigger than…

Continue

Added by KariGrant on March 19, 2012 at 2:31pm — 7 Comments

Those Were Different Times #169: To Catch An Edition

Those Were Different Times #169: To Catch An Edition

Introducing: "Music for those who think young"

---------------

Resuts: The Images Have it:

---------------



4. Judy was bummed once she found out she wasn't dating Dr. Pepper.

-gerhardguffaw



3. "I got that bitch a Pepsi. Bitches love Pepsi."

-vomitflop



2.…

Continue

Added by mellowpuma on March 18, 2012 at 7:00pm — 15 Comments

Overlooked Towns In California

San Luis Pepto Bismo (Known for its pink sunsets),

Vasalina (Easy highway access on and off),

Twentyeight Palms (Last stop before Twentynine Palms),

Rosie Palm Springs (Off beaten path),

Less Fullerton,

Loxnard (Jewish retirement community),

Short Beach,

Needless (Goes without saying),

Rolling Pills Estates,

Redundant Beach,

Redundant Beach,

Added by KariGrant on March 17, 2012 at 6:00pm — 15 Comments

What is your favorite movie?

YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE
This is amazing!…
Continue

Added by Shag on March 16, 2012 at 2:23pm — 5 Comments

Stuff That Turns Beer Green

Pickle Relish,

Lime Jello,

Shamrocks,

Go lights,

S&H Savings Stamps,

Pistacio Pudding,

Spinach,

Green Peace bumper stickers,

Comedy Whirled Blimps,

Frogs,

Added by KariGrant on March 16, 2012 at 12:13pm — 3 Comments

Names for the Pope's New Cologne

Slant found this fragrant tidbit for us to breathe:

"Names for the Pope's New Designer Cologne"

Pope Pouri,

Papal Smear,

Casoli de Holy,

Holy Toilet Water,

Limey Bastard,

Let Us Spray,

Pilgrim's Parfume,

Secretions of Peter,

My Little Myrrhmaid,

Pre-Procreatin',

Potent Taint,

Pope o'le Pew,

Added by KariGrant on March 15, 2012 at 2:00pm — 22 Comments

What You Yell at a Leprechaun

Are you trying to chaun me??

Show me your bag of gold!

Where's the pot?

Do you carry Lepresy?

I didn't know Shillelaghs require batteries.

That's a really big root you're sitting on.

Meet me later at the Whiskey.

Want to fiddle with me?

Show me some sparkles!

You're not a Leprechaun just because…

Continue

Added by KariGrant on March 15, 2012 at 1:26pm — 9 Comments

Things You Should NOT Put on a Pizza

Lead-based paint chips,

Fur balls,

Broken rubber bands,

Feathers,

Lug bolts,

Found teeth,

Scabs,

Porcupine quills,

Dog whispers,

Used stamps,

 

Added by KariGrant on March 14, 2012 at 3:20pm — 25 Comments

Things at the Bank

Yon Bonnie,

Deposit slips,

Crawdads,

Money,

Blood,

Sperm,

Rolls of quarters,

Okies noodling,

Pens,

Turtles,

 

Added by KariGrant on March 13, 2012 at 8:29pm — 8 Comments

New Hybrid Fruits

Currants with Formmers and Yettobbes,

Logan's Run Berries,

Goose and Wedgie Berries,

Non-ethnic Specific Berries,

The Last Strawberries,

Concord/747 Grapes,

Richard Persimmons,

Aprifutons,

Honey Dew Not Melons,

Pango-pango Mangos,

 

 

Added by KariGrant on March 12, 2012 at 8:26pm — 8 Comments

Monthly Archives

2017

2016

2015

2014

2013

2012

2011

2010

1999

1970

1969

© 2017   Whirled Wide Network   Powered by You! Thank You for your continued support.

Badges  |  Grab a tissue  |  Terms of Service