YAY! I made it to the Season 4 Yobi.tv Laugh finals! Please vote for me DAILY:
I am so sick of getting a sore throat, perusing WebMD for a good two hours, only to self-diagnose myself with rabies. Now I’m stuck with the task of trying to talk myself out of this obviously rational thought.
Have you ever been inside my head, WebMD? It’s not fun is it? And yeah… I haven’t figured out why it’s so sticky yet either.
So stop telling me I’m going to die, WebMD! Or that I’m pregnant,…
Good tidings, yon sufferes to be AND TRICKTERS OF THE BEAST'S DESIGN. The universe has revealed to me through absenth, paint thinner huffing, and carbon monoxide vapors which fill my cave, that you all have problems, deep deep deep problems .... IN THE…Continue
Those Were Different Times #166: The Endoritocoolranchification
Introducing "CHANTILLY LACE STARRING THE BIG BOPPER HELLOOO BABY!"
2. She's gonna be disappointed when she looks just to her right and realizes she's ten times his size.
1. "Sorry I haven't called in a while, but I'll admit I was
intimidated by your height…
If you thought LSU finished the season as BCS runner up, well think again. There is exciting news coming out of Baton Rouge…LSU has announced that it is adding another 28,000 seats to the South end of Tiger stadium officially making the facility the (BCS) Biggest Capacity Stadium in the country and champions of most seats.
We love the The "Democratic People's Republic" of Korea, not for its inhumane actions. No, we love it for its propaganda machine. It really is one of the best comedy writing staffs on the planet. North Koreans may be oppressed and starving, but there is no way they actually believe that Kim Jong-il aced 11 out of 18 holes the first, or any time that he golfed. They also don't believe that he never ever ever, not even once... took a dump. …Continue
First off, a big thank you to all who've participated. In regards to your questions, you've all been unquestionably stupid. Here are the results:
Winner of the: For some reason employ people to hunt you down and actually give you an answer to your stupid question award, goes to Gerhardguffaw, for asking: "Why can't I get the English…Continue
"If I wanted to see mammals feeding their young with their own self producing lactic fluids I'd go to a god damned zoo and "Awww" at its adorable quaintness on the other side of plexiglass where it belongs! Now feed my wife this god damned hand pealed citrus or I'll murder every last one of us!"
Has this ever happened to you? If you have a family this kind of scene plays out to your horror each and every day until you're finally murdered for feeding someone the wrong produce. I've…Continue
Did you know that the universe continues to expand? It gets a little bit bigger every day. As this happens, galaxies move ever farther away from each other. There will come a time in the distant future when we (I say “we,” but of course we will be long dead by then (although I have been thinking about having my head frozen so my brain could be put into an android’s body when that technology becomes available—and it will happen, trust me))look up to the night sky, and won’t see anything,…Continue
Here are your final Power Rankings for 2011. Can anyone take down the two-time defending champion in 2012?…Continue