All Blog Posts (1,104)

Those Were Different Times #403

Those Were Different Times #402

With the final season of Game of Thrones fast approaching it's important to understand exactly how a dragon produces fire.

Calling them 'Fire-breathing' is not entirely accurate.  Call them 'Fire-exhaling' Dragons to be more precise.

Much like the monkeys that eat the charcoal for digestion, dragons regularly seek out flint and marcasite-rich…

Those Were Different Times #401

-

-

-

Results:

5. "Fifty NOs and a YES means YES."

-Ian

4. She would later star in the sequel, Dr. No Means No!

-Mario!!!

3. ♫Fieldings. Nothing more than ♫ fieldings...

-Karigrant

2. Song 1: We're Not A Great Spy Team

-JJJ23

1. When he shakes her she doesn't stir – the good old Cosby martini!

-MacSpruce    (oof, that's hard)…

Those Were Different Times #400

-

-

-

Results:

4, The Incredible Husk.

-Karigrant

3. The real reason Dr Frankenstein's monster went ballistic, this was his junk.

-Mervin97

2, Do you guys have any idea how many "rotten wang" caps I'm not typing?

-rotwang

1. Then Dorothy asked “But scarecrow!! I thought you wanted a heart??”

-iverneil…

Those Were Different Times #399

-

-

-

Results:

3,"Stop trying to brainwash us with the power of suggestion, Oliver Stone!"

-VomitFlop

2. Sure it's effective, but it does require quite a lot of self-amputation.

-Mario!!!

1. "...I'm going to say one word: Plastics. That's all you're allowed to eat now."

-Ian…

Those Were Different Times #398

-

-

-

Results:

3. That game received a very spoor rating.

-Iverneil

"Well, the thing is, they aren't exactly being propelled by jetpacks."

"Also coming soon to the Smegma Genesis!"

2. Pooper Mario Bros.

-VomitFlop

No one messes with this powerful squat. -I mean squad.

1. That's it, private, you are relieved of your dookie!

-Rotwang…

Those Were Different Times #397

-

-

-

Results:

When it came to spreading Christmas Cheer, they really phoned it in back in the Fifties.

4. Not to be confused with "Hanukkah up Your Ass."

-Mario!!!

"Pardon me, sir, but what is a Jerky boy?"

3. "CF phone home."

-VomitFlop

2. ...would prove to be the cause of death, clogging both the aorta and the jugular with pine needles, bits of glass ornaments and eggnog.

-Ian

1. "I…

Those Were Different Times #396

-

-

-

Results:

--- a blue christmas ... ---

3. He had a round little belly that shook when he laughed like a bowl full of jizz.

-KariGrant

It was Santa's last stop of the night and he emptied his sack.

2. Santa always comes in December, and sometimes he comes in Mae.

-MacSpruce

1. ♪ Don't stand so Claus to me. ♪

-VomitFlop…

Those Were Different Times #395

4. "Yes, there were giant toilet paper rolls in space."

-Ian

3. One small step for man-on-mankind.

-Rotwang

2. Featuring the Yiddish hit, "Somewhere Oy Vey, the Rainbow.

-KariGrant

1. From the folks who brought you George S. Patton Ocean Cloud Pancakes.

-JJJ23…

Those Were Different Times #394

Results:

-

-

-

5. No more piano lessons, mom.

-Rotwang

4. Even after fully militarizing in the streets the spotlight continued to elude Kane.

-Ian

3. Featuring the hit' "I've Never Heard Of This Rambo Character, I have No Idea What You're Talking About" and the the ballad "Second Blood".

-JJJ23

2. Sorry no shirt no solo.

-Mervin97

1.0001. Gland on the…

Now that Taylor Swift has stopped being just a song writer and musician and has jumped into Partisan Politics alienating 1/2 of her Fan Base I have decided she may need some help with new Song Titles that align with hers and their Platforms... 

You should add your own Song Title suggestions to…

A Summary of the Kavanaugh Hearing by a Victim of Fraternity Rush Week Roof to Pool Diving Circa 1983

so a bunch of nerd senators are going after kdog because of some weird female hysteria.

then it's like,…

Those Were Different Times #393

-

-

-

3. "I hope you like chamber music."

-Ian

2. Don't come a-knockin' if the coffin is rockin'. 

-MacSpruce

1.

Buried With Children

-Mario!!!…

Those Were Different Times #392

-

-

-

Results;

3. It'll give you a tromboner!

-Mario!!!

2. "Now includes Music to Watch Large Girls By featuring Sal Iva on Tuba."

-Ian

Trumpets for Strumpets

1. aka Herpes Alpert and the Gonorrhea Brass

-MacSpruce…

Those Were Different Times #391

-

-

-

Results:

4. Even if you only listen to it once, you have to register as a sex offender.

-Mario!!!

3. It's like a few minutes of wet slapping.It's like a few minutes of wet slapping.

-jjj23

Organ ickily grown

2. Some of the tunes have words, others are hummers.

 -MacSpruce

1. *all the compositions in the songbook are written to be played with only one…

Those Were Different Times #390

-

-

-

Results:

2. For everyone's sake it's better than being the gassy giant.

-Mervin97Oh,

1.5. he's friendly alright. I see he's fondling Twin Peaks again. And the less said about that episode with the lighthouse, the better. 

1. You misunderstood; I didn't say he showers the village with gold …-macspruce…

Those Were Different Times #389

-

-

-

Results:

and the special "Oof" award goes to:

Sure, he tried to look like he was all business, but everyone could tell Gary was a total phoney.

-Mario!!!

Unfortunately for Gary, business was no longer interested in getting down with him.

2, "So, who the fuck were you before you went into that phone booth?"

-VomitFlop

Putting a gloryhole in a…

Those Were Different Times #388

-

-

-

Results:

4. Such "happy occasions" include searching for the real killers.

-JJJ23

♪ ♫ ♬ When the blade hits your eye just like a pizza pie there's more of you eh? ♪ ♫ ♬

"Hey Cake, Pizza and Watermelon, come over here and play with me!

3. ""Only the penitent man may pass."

-Ian

2. The Stab never caught on like the Twist or the Mashed Potato, probably…