All Blog Posts (924)

Those Were Different Times #265

Those Were Different Times #264

Those Were Different Times #263

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Resutls:

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2. And now for my next trick, I will change this Republican back into a human.

-Mike McHuman

1. His family was Nuts.

-38chrysler…

Those Were Different Times #262

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Results:

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3. ♪♫ This land is your land, this land is my land...♫♪

-Iverneil

2. What kinda peace pipe is that?"

-VomitFlop

1. The Last of the Mohicans talking into The Last of the Victrolas.

-Jams3kds…

Rear ending parked cars. 

Virgin Sacrifices to Virgin Airlines (unauthorized).

Tag Team Naugahyde Fabric Repair.

Consumer Credit Mockers.

Evidence Swallowing.

Ghaza Strippers.

Group Women’s Bench Press, starting with five on the Supreme Court Bench.

Executive  Dinner Decisions.

Yoga Milking.

Power Pointing.

They were trying to kill ants with a magnifying glass.

Too many damn Foreigners.

Somebody rubbed two Styx together.

They was a'smokin' in bed.

Two words: Hot Licks.

Too many pocket rockets.

Both bands were "lit."

Their bifocals ignited the crossword puzzle book.

Hot chicks on board.

They were Hot Blooded.

Those Were Different Times #261

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Results:

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5.3. "Alex, I'll take 'Scissoring with your long-time companion' for $500."

5. A ma'ams leash should exceed her grasp.

-FroDoh!

3.4. Apply a little pressure then, Voila!! he poops right where you want him to.

3. Taxidermy aside, she still managed to enjoy their traditional morning walk.

-Iverneil

2. Rover Weighed

-vomitFlop

1. Schnauzer…

Those Were Different Times #260

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Results:

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8.Over the years, Google Glass has become only slightly less dorky looking.

-MacSpruce

7.2. Madonna merely perfected what her great aunts pioneered.

7. Cone-dependency isn't pretty.

-FroDoh!

6.I see your point.

-Iverneil

5. Oral contraception.

-Nuje NcGynab

4. The beak will inherit the…

Illegal Immigrant Chaser, Shrinking Ukraine, Auntie Em-80s, Pinworm Wheels,  Pocket Rocket,  GM Airbag o’sparkles,  Whistling Dictator,  Tampon Trailers, Ambulance Chasers, Syrian Lysteria, Sterling Shower of Insults, 

I hate these things...

How do you prove you're human?  For me, it's by crying within the first 10 minutes of Les Miserables, and then every minute of thereafter...damn…

Those Were Different Times #259

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Results:

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and the "a lot of work went into this" award goes to:

The Once-ler: Look, Lorax, calm down. There’s no cause for alarm. I chopped just one tree, I've turned it to yarn. This tree is most useful! And this thing's a “thneed.” A theed's a fine something-that-all-people-need! It’s a bra. It’s a sock. It’s a ring for your cock! It’s a glove! It's a thong! And voila, it's a bong! You can use it like…

Those Were Different Times #258

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Results:

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6. That's how "Lost" should have ended.

-Mike McHuman

5. I pity the fuel!

-Gerhardguffaw

4. You shall not pass!

-MPG

3. How Chuck Norris catches a plane.

-MacSpruce

2. We must, We must, We Must Increase Our Thrust!

-LL Bein

1. Inverted skydiving

-Bubba Licious…

Those Were Different Times #256

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7. Everyone admired Stacey's stick-two-itiveness.

-FroDoh!

6. Tonight she sleeps with the xylophone.

-Gerahard guffaw

5. A little higher on the forehead and you should get an A♭.

-Mike Mchuman

4. With mallets toward none

-MacSpruce

3.75. Marge to the beat of a different drummer.

3. She's okay. She only suffered a mild…

Those Were Different Times #257

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2. Their mission is to bring people to cheeses.

-MacSpruce

1. Meanwhile, in Wisconsin...

-VomitFlop…

Sorry I was gone for so long…here is a list of some reasons for my absence

I broke my main typing fingers whilst picking my nose

It slipped my mind

I was in a coma

Several famous celebrities died that were near and dear to me

I’ve been hallucinating

I had food poisoning

I have been tearing up the caption contest on Funny or Die

It was that time of the month

I was in jail and I wasn’t able to roll “doubles” successfully to get…