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Those Were Different Times #314

Those Were Different Times #314

Added by mellowpuma on July 7, 2015 at 5:54am — 45 Comments

Those Were Different Times #313

Those Were Different Times #313

Added by mellowpuma on July 7, 2015 at 5:53am — 41 Comments

Not Dr Tongue's 3D House of Cats

Okay, so this has very little to do with comedy.. nothing, really. But it's kinda fun (I think). And at least as un-boring as mellowpuma's pumpkin carvings (which I thought were brilliant, by the way). 

I recently posted some "3D" animated gifs I created from stereo pairs of images taken on an old Stereo Realist camera. They sort of work, but their 3D-ness is pretty limited.…

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Added by MacSpruce on July 1, 2015 at 3:28am — 4 Comments

Those Were Different Times #311

Those Were Different Times #311

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2. When it comes to attention-getting, it's hard to beat the parrot and shtick approach.

-MacSpruce

1. Before her parents could react, the bird swiftly decapitated her.

-VomitFlop…

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Added by mellowpuma on June 13, 2015 at 3:00am — 40 Comments

Those Were Different Times #312

Those Were Different Times #312

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5. Honey Dew was sweet as sunshine. Carnegie Mellon, on the other hand, tasted like Pittsburgh.

-Frodoh

4. Georgie always had a flair for the melondramatic.

-MacSpruce

3 . Sammy, listen, there never was a Watermelon Eating Contest. You need to stop now."

-VomitFlop

2.8. Tune in next week for another episode of "Let's Kill the Fat Kid".

2.1. We told him the seeds…

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Added by mellowpuma on June 13, 2015 at 3:00am — 28 Comments

Those Were Different Times #309

Those Were Different Times #309

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6. Joe always felt sorry for that guy.

-Mervin97

5. "You hear that, Invisible Man? Even this magic mirror knows you're here."

-VOmitFlop

Luckily, he has the memory of a goldfish.

4. He also like to peck at the mirror, like a parakeet.

-theDIRTYmidget

Starchy and Hush

3. Why are they singling me out??????

-Iverneil

"Mirror,…

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Added by mellowpuma on May 9, 2015 at 3:30am — 33 Comments

Those Were Different Times #310

Those Were Different Times #310

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5. I'm going to boldly go with the refried beans.

-Iverneil

4. I'll take 'Id & Superego' for $400 Alex.

-RunSilent RunDeep



"I guess if there's still food, we haven't been cancelled yet."

3. "I've poisoned your food."

"Counting my life and career, that's a hat-trick."

-theDIRTYmidget

2. An hour later they experienced the wrath of…

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Added by mellowpuma on May 9, 2015 at 3:30am — 39 Comments

Those Were Different Times #308

Those Were Different Times #308

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6. Terminal Velocipede

-MacSpruce

5. He's the kid with the gravelly voice.

-Iverneil

4. "NOTE TO SELF:

Baseball-cards, bad idea."

-theDIRTYmidget

3. His mother tried to warn him. She told him the bike gangs were dangerous.

-KariGrant

2. What really happens when people who are hating see you rolling.

-VomitFlop

1.9999. The only performance enhancing drug for Lance…

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Added by mellowpuma on April 16, 2015 at 10:30am — 50 Comments

Those Were Different Times #307

Those Were Different Times #307

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5. You'll never guess which one is Mrs. Voorhees.

-VomitFlop

4. Miss Death to America

-Rotwang

3.  ...And the winner is, KATHY GRIFFIN!!

-Iverneil

2. "Let's hear it, ladies and gentlemen.

Aren't they really ALL Miss Butterface?"

-theDIRTYmidget



1. Oh Purdah Woman

-MacSpruce…

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Added by mellowpuma on April 16, 2015 at 10:00am — 41 Comments

Those Were Different Times #305

Those Were Different Times #305

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and the special "Wow, Just Wow" award goes to:

♫♪♫ "Double your pleasure

Double your fun

I've got 2 mini-sluts

And you have none

One is a prostitute

One is a nun

I shall eat them alive

On a hot-dog bun

Double your pleasure

Double your fun

I just birthed them

Right out of my cun'

Refreshen your life mint

It's the right mint

The…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 31, 2015 at 5:00am — 44 Comments

Those Were Different Times #306

Those Were Different Times #306

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5. "No, let me guess. He's The Chosen One, isn't he? Of course, he is! After all, why wouldn't he be?"

-VomitFlop

She knows it's time for a changing when his

helmet fills and sloshes with urine and feces.

4. His first words were "Danger, Will Robinson!"

-theDIRTYmidget



3. It's so much easier to get your child vaccinated. Stupid hipster…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 31, 2015 at 5:00am — 42 Comments

crap on the barcelona chair & stool we all lust after. because we're chair perverts?

so, some dude wants to sell a chair.  which is fine, except this is not the place to do it.  also, it's a horrible eyesore. also it looks like it'd give anyone a backache.  also screw this guy. let's all tell him how much we hate his chair.

where's the fucking stool, asshole?  …

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Added by mellowpuma on March 31, 2015 at 3:00am — 5 Comments

OTHER HOUSES

House of Kurds, House of Curds, House of Cads, House of Cruds, International House of Pan Cards, House of Hallmark Cards, House of Cards with Flowers in the Attic, Last House of Cards on the Left, Hill House of Cards, How’s My Driving?

Added by KariGrant on March 24, 2015 at 3:37pm — 10 Comments

Those Were Different Times #304

Those Were Different Times #304

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8. She was the only living hair to the Le Pew fortune.

-JJJ23

7. Um, Rachel. It's, "I want to be alone," not, "I want to be a lawn."

-RunSilentRunDeep

6. There is never enough nudity in Alaskan porn movies.

-Gerhardguffaw

Has a plumber on site 24/7.

5. When Cruella was still into Border Collies.

-theDIRTYmidget

4. Having never heard the expression…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 19, 2015 at 9:30am — 54 Comments

Those Were Different Times #303

Those Were Different Times #303

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3. He was so plastered that night!!

-Iverneil

2. "Rung, Forrest, rung!"

-VomitFlop

1. Ladder Day Saint

-Frodoh…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 19, 2015 at 9:30am — 37 Comments

Animal Body Parts Not Talked About In School

Platypussy,

Platymelts,

Mountain-cloisters,

Scrodumbs,

Geezerds,

Sphynxters (old school),

Tequilla’s Heel,

Yam String,

Outtestines,

Appendicks,

Fullopium Tubes,

Tent-tickles,

Added by KariGrant on March 9, 2015 at 8:54am — 6 Comments

Those Were Different Times #301

Those Were Different Times #301

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8. Staring is caring.

-JJJ23

7. This is Peoples Express, not Penis Express sir.

-Drwho

6. "You must be irish."

-Mervin97

5. Would you like some TWA tea?

-MacSpruce

4. Disco to New York. Dat go to Miami.

-KariGrant

3. "Warm nuts?"

-theDIRTYmidget

2. ♪♫ Moon Me to the Fly ♫♪

-FroDoh

1. ♪♫..And one of there days these boots…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 8, 2015 at 9:30am — 43 Comments

Those Were Different Times #302

Those Were Different Times #302

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9. They could have gone far in life if only they weren't two tired.

-38chrysler

8.34. With considerable time and effort, the Picard family finally managed to make it sew.

8. They got pulled over for tailorgating.

-MacSpruce

7. In Russia the sewing rides you.

-drwho



6. Sew sew sew your bike gently down the…

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Added by mellowpuma on March 8, 2015 at 9:30am — 56 Comments

March Days to Celebrate

St. Fatty’s Day, The Eyes of March, March Hair Loss Day, Clams on the Half-Assed Drunk Day, Crochet your Crotch Day, Peanut Butter Liver Day, Seuss Sweeps Week, Borderline Personalitied Collies Day, Nuzzle with a Buzzard Day, Quilted Noreastern A Comin In Day, I Have A Hairy Hoohadini Day,

Added by KariGrant on March 3, 2015 at 7:18pm — 2 Comments

Police Academy Award Nominations:

"D.C. Sniper" “Jail Birdman” “Juvies in the Hood" "The Grand Larceny Hotel" "The Incarceration Game" “Into the Paddy Wagon” “Tell It To The Judge” “Perpcatcher” “Fifty Shades of Whiplashes” “InterCell” "Mr. Taser"

Added by KariGrant on February 24, 2015 at 1:49pm — 5 Comments

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