Comedy Whirled

Caption Contest 08-10-2017

Bronze:

Crawler translation: (Today in entertainment news, Taylor Swift say word "Ass" in court). - MadAdam

Silver:

"You know what they say: Here today, Guam tomorrow." - Mario!!!

Gold:

"We're expecting record highs this Saturday, with an afternoon temperature of more than 100,000,000° Celsius.  Be sure to have plenty of water on hand and apply 50,000,000 SPF sunscreen every five minutes, even if you're indoors." - Ian

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Comment by mellowpuma on August 20, 2017 at 1:43am

yes, because guam is the black heart of american evil.  with their lack of votes in congress.  america will surely fold if guam is attacked.  they won't, say, destroy every power plant in our country with drones the next day and leave our people starving in the dark.  could never happen.

Comment by JJJ23 on August 15, 2017 at 1:59pm

And as you can clearly see here, not touching can't get mad.

Comment by JJJ23 on August 15, 2017 at 1:58pm

It's about time somebody showed the ocean who's boss.

Comment by JJJ23 on August 15, 2017 at 11:52am

We'll blow up this very expensive missile in the ocean and your family will go hungry tonight. Meanwhile, in other news, China still exists and so do tunnels and I'm being told I've just been shot.

Comment by mellowpuma on August 15, 2017 at 5:42am

siri, define gallows humor ...

Comment by mellowpuma on August 15, 2017 at 5:41am

yeah, russia is giving missle tech to north korea, but we have a great relationship with the russians.  yup.

Comment by mellowpuma on August 15, 2017 at 5:37am

we have to avoid painting ourselves into a corner, and playing into kim jong's narrative, mr trump.  i've got it, fire and fury.  done. 

Comment by mellowpuma on August 15, 2017 at 5:32am

so the fate of guam lies in the hands of dennis rodman?  can politics get less surreal someday soon?

Comment by mellowpuma on August 15, 2017 at 5:31am

maybe the russians can dig up some kim jong emails and resolve the situation.

Comment by Scrunt on August 12, 2017 at 11:02pm

Guam: Praying that North Korea puts the miss in missile since 2017.

Comment by Scrunt on August 12, 2017 at 10:55pm

How rude, didn't his mother ever tell him it's not polite to point?

Comment by Scrunt on August 12, 2017 at 10:54pm

"Yes, Mr. President, you're right this is just like the Cuban Missile Crisis... Except that the Soviet Union isn't involved... And neither is Cuba... And the missiles are going to be fired at the island nation, not stored there... But other than that... And many, many other things... This is exactly like that situation."

Comment by Gerhardguffaw on August 12, 2017 at 5:50pm

"And in world news today, North Korea launched an arrow that just missed Guam."

Comment by Iverneil on August 12, 2017 at 5:40pm

In other news, American bombers have been dropping millions of Kool Aid packets all over North Korea

Comment by MadAdam on August 12, 2017 at 12:13am

Within minutes of this broadcast, Trump tries to fire Attorney General Jeff Sessions and "crown" him "Mayor of Guam".

Comment by MadAdam on August 11, 2017 at 11:15pm

Watching this with his staff, Trump turns and asks "Can we put it back on 2 Broke Girls now?"

Comment by MadAdam on August 11, 2017 at 11:14pm

Watching this with his staff, Trump turns and asks "What does km mean?"

Comment by MadAdam on August 11, 2017 at 11:13pm

Watching this with his staff, Trump turns and asks "Can missiles fly over water?"

Comment by MadAdam on August 11, 2017 at 10:03pm

Crawler translation: "In stunning show of ineptitude, Trump sends Jared Kushner to broker peace treaty between North and South Carolina".

Comment by MadAdam on August 11, 2017 at 9:18pm

New type missile "Mydong Uranus" has been tested an is ready to go.

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