Comedy Whirled

Caption Contest 04-20-2017

Honorable Mentions:

But then again, what do I know? After all, I voted for Trump. - MacSpruce

"Heaven is just a nick name.  My full name is actually Heavens To Murgatroyd Exit Stage Left.  My parents were huge Snagglepuss fans.” - Scrunt

She had a crush on an atheist, but as far as he was concerned she didn't exist. - RoadKillHairPiece

don't hand this one the mic, unless you want to hear about gmo food for half an hour. - mellowpuma


Special Orange Alertness Award:

When he's not talking to fish, Aquaman prefers to hide in plain sight. - Ian


Bronze:

Now I can't get into either bathroom! - Iverneil

Silver:

I mean, I'm just saying maybe I exist? - JJJ23

Gold:

"Nothing personal, sir. I was just saying that some of my best friends are toadying, spineless, yellow-belly politicians." - RunSilent RunDeep

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Comment by Scrunt on April 20, 2017 at 6:21pm

  Ooh, baby, do you know what that's worth?  Ooh, heaven is a person on earth 

Comment by Scrunt on April 20, 2017 at 6:19pm

Heaven isn't too far away.  Closer to her every day.  No matter what your friends might say, we will find our way

Comment by Scrunt on April 20, 2017 at 6:19pm

“When Father Murphy tried to take ‘Our Father, who art in Heaven’ a little too literally, I cut his dick off!”

Comment by Scrunt on April 20, 2017 at 6:18pm

“Let's face it, with a name like Heaven, it's a miracle I’m not dancing naked on a pole right now.”

Comment by Scrunt on April 20, 2017 at 6:17pm

“On the bright side, I will always have a Heavenly body even if I never go to the gym again.”

Comment by Scrunt on April 20, 2017 at 6:17pm

“Be honest.  If I was black, no one would think my name was weird at all, would they?”

Comment by Scrunt on April 20, 2017 at 6:17pm

"Heaven is just a nick name.  My full name is actually Heavens To Murgatroyd Exit Stage Left.  My parents were huge Snagglepuss fans.”

Comment by Scrunt on April 20, 2017 at 6:16pm

“Were my parents stoned when they named me?  Well, I was born on 4/20, so it seems likely.”

Comment by Scrunt on April 20, 2017 at 6:16pm

Heaven's Hate

Comment by Mario!!! on April 20, 2017 at 8:32am

"And that's when I let his St. Peter enter my Heavenly gate, if you know what I mean..."

Comment by Mario!!! on April 20, 2017 at 8:30am

In case you were wondering, yes, all dogs go to Heaven.

Comment by Iverneil on April 20, 2017 at 8:06am

Now I can't get into either bathroom!

Comment by VomitFlop on April 20, 2017 at 7:57am

Now, in it's 430th season, The Voice struggles to remain relevant.

Comment by VomitFlop on April 20, 2017 at 7:54am

"Hello, I am a stereotype who has become officially triggered. What say you, scum?"

Comment by VomitFlop on April 20, 2017 at 7:53am

Birth of a Procrastination

Comment by VomitFlop on April 20, 2017 at 7:51am

"Alright, you may drop the mic now, sir. My point has been stated."

Comment by VomitFlop on April 20, 2017 at 7:50am

"You heard me correctly. The culprit was none other than Bill O'Reilly."

Comment by VomitFlop on April 20, 2017 at 7:48am

"Oh, I get it. Your parents named you Heaven ironically."

Comment by KariGrant on April 20, 2017 at 7:36am

It says "Heathrow." That's where they found me. I don't know how I got there or who I am.

Comment by Mervin97 on April 20, 2017 at 5:57am

"Waaaa....waaa...waaa...blah.....blah...blah....waaa."

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