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Mr. Bruce Ricker, aka theDIRTYmidget© died??!  General discussion about TDM for anyone who remembers him. He was off of CW here for a few years, I guess that mighta been for health reasons. Ug.  

General discussion. 

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He came, he saw, he came again. Good night Bruce.

1. The radiant glow behind the gate represents the eternal availabilty of oral-sex and opiates.
-theDIRTYmidget

(uniquely fitting)

2. ... will fuck a cantaloupe in front of your wife to prove that you mean business.
-theDIRTYmidget

1.5“ ... An Introduction To Suicide Pacts. ”
1.3“ ... It Chases Imaginary Objects While You Chase Imaginary Love. ”
1.2“ ... An Interspecies Guide To Coping With Ugly Wallpaper. ”
1.1“ ... The Solace of a Rough Tongue In a Harsh World. ”
-theDIRTYmidget

1. "We call Jay Snell 'Gay Smell' behind his back." 
-theDIRTYmidget

1. First, find out what meat is.
TheDIRTYmidget

1.825. : Make fart sounds at church.

1.75. : Weep so loud it breaks a window.

1. : Use only zany fonts. 
theDIRTYmidget

 

1. "Sorry I haven't called in a while, but I'll admit I was 
intimidated by your height and meat-loaf sized clitoris!" 

-theDIRTYmidget

4. "...to tell your parents I ejaculated in my hand and flung it at you during this seminar. Do you realize how crazy that will sound?"
-theDIRTYmidget

i saw it on the front page a few days ago, but just haven't reacted to it yet.  still doesn't seem quite real.

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when it came to writing in general, he was a golden god.   more than a few times i forgot he was a real person, because the persona he crafted was so cogent.

back at funnyordie, at first he seemed like some prototype of an internet creepy dude.  but when you got to know him, you found out that was a clever act he used to dissuade dumb people.  in point of fact he always treated everyone with an often insane amount of respect.  

early days on fod, he was my first friend, that really engaged. i wouldn't be here if it weren't for him, that's not an overstatement. i wouldn't have stuck around at fod, or jumped  to comedywhirled.  he actively lobbied me to come here for about two weeks before i caved.

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remember how he used to trademark his jokes  with the little "tm" symbol?

remember how he used to always send two private messages to make sure you got them?

remember how he wrote page long messages which contained a minimum of 5 questions?

apparently he was a professional cartoonist or illustrator, but i've never seen his stuff.

remember back at fod, when lizzardladyfla was roasting people?  he told me i wrote the most hurtful comment in that ordeal, and it was this:  "his mustache is bad".  i guess my point is, he was so cool, sometimes i'd forget he wasn't bulletproof.  also, out of all the short / sleazy / midget jokes we made about him THAT is the one that hit him below the belt?  

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he was the funniest and most interesting person i've met on the internet.   i ran into him at a time in my life when i had been burned by friends real bad.  so, i probably kept him at arm's length more than was reasonable.  but he kept relentlessly being my friend, and i'll miss him.  so yeah, theDIRTYmidget and i were bro-ing at a "chasing amy" level at one point. 

sooo... what i'm really saying here is this: if i ever become a gay necrophiliac, i'm digging up theDIRTYmiget. (he would have loved this joke)

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what are your favorite theDIRTYmiget quotes?  i'll look back and find mine.

He did a parody photoshopped image of A River Runs Through It called "A Midget Runs Through It".  I wish I could find it, maybe it died somewhere in the bowels of FOD.  

This may be my favorite of his:

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