Let's rip into our heroes!
Don Rickles looks like Humpty Dumpty after he fell off the wall and sat out in the sun for a few days.
Many don't know this but Don Rickles was the first to be thrown out of the Klan when they found out he was a jew.
Dane Cook fell off from respectability faster than Richard Pryor backpedaled on those bits about sucking cock.
Bill Cosby has gone to work on more sedated vaginas than an actual 80's era OB/GYN.
Scott Aukerman looks like if the devil fucked Mr. Rogers with Pee-wee's dick at a screening of Frozen.
Tig Notaro looks like Pinocchio at 40.
Anthony Tosh and Daniel Jeselnik would get more work if they just merged through osmosis.
You might be Bill Engvall if you blew Jeff Foxworthy for three tours to stay on the bill...
...and you might be Larry the Cable Guy if you held the camera.
Louie CK's show should be called Seinfeld(if Seinfeld's life came to a point where he should have killed himself but didn't).
You are on a roll. Better than most Comedy Central Roasts!
Very much appreciated, I can't express how much.
Jeff Ross is incredible at roasting his fellow comedians...eating well, exercising, managing his career, comedy outside of roasts, washing himself, these are just a few things Jeff is less than incredible at.
I'll rip someone I HATE. Dennis Leary: